"Are you sure you don't want to change your mind?" My mom asked, gazing at me worriedly. I could see the concern in her expression.
I shook my head in response.
"Just say the word and we'll go back home." She continued.
I sighed and took her hand in mine. "Mummy, I'm fine." I said, my lips curving up into a smile of assurance.
Her shoulders went down as she relaxed. She nodded and pulled me to herself. I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around her. As I relaxed into her warmth, I considered going back like she suggested. But my mind was made up. I pulled back from her before I changed my mind. Two more seconds in her arms, and I'd be crying and begging her to take me home.
"Be careful, okay?"
"Yes, mummy." I said and turned to open the car door.
I didn't miss the flash of worry in her eyes as I closed the door. My hands tightened on the straps of my schoolbag as I watched the car leave. At that moment, I desperately wanted to run after the car scream for it to stop, but my legs stayed fixed to the spot and the words hung in my throat.
Letting out a deep sigh in a whoosh, I turned towards the school gate. I could feel my heart beat rising, thudding in my chest. My hand went up to my chest to still my racing heart.
I'll be fine.
It had been three weeks. Three whole weeks since I'd left this place.
Three weeks since it happened.
I felt my heart clench at the memory.
Breathe...
I sucked in a deep breath, then let it out, just like my therapist had advised me to do. I repeated the action as I walked into the school premises.
'I'll be fine', I told myself.
I didn't miss the stares and whispers from the few students I passed by. I expected it. The news of the incident must have travelled fast. I chuckled to myself.
I soon got to my classroom block, the senior block. I walked into the corridor and onto the staircase. I could feel my legs tremble as I climbed the stairs. With each step, I was getting closer to the judgemental looks and not so silent whispers I'd probably get from my mates. I got to the top of the staircase and paused.
My heart picked up again.
Breathe...
I breathed in and out, repeatedly. But it wasn't working, my heart seemed to beat faster with each breath. I could feel myself panicking slowly.
"Nini!"
I turned abruptly at the voice. I'd recognize the voice anywhere. It was Wumi, my one and only best friend. She raced up the stairs to meet me. Before I could say anything, she gathered me into a bone crushing hug, and it seemed to still my beating heart. It certainly did.
"Wumi" I whimpered. "I missed you."
"I missed you more. School has been awful without you."
I was glad she didn't whine about how I'd ghosted everyone and how i had been unreachable for the past weeks, or how I refused to see her the countless times she visited.
"I'm sorry. I'm here now." I breathed into her shoulder.
She released me from the hug. I noticed it when she quickly wiped the tear that had found it's way down her cheek. I smiled, still holding her hand.
I wanted to break down and cry to her, to swear and curse the bastard who was behind my misery. I wanted to cry about how much I'd missed her during my absence, about how I wished she was there with me....
