Join Chasity as she navigates through her junior year struggling to maintain the relationship of her childhood bestfriend while also confronting her sexuality. it was all fun and games until she got a taste. will she be able to come to terms with wh...
I found myself watching denali the whole rest of my first day. I wondered how she would feel if she knew the way i felt about her. If she knew she was the first thing i thought about every morning when i woke up and every night before i go to sleep. She even appears in my dreams. Because of her i've never had a nightmare. Instead i was drowning in her perfection. when i got home from school i told my parents all about my day and went up to my room.
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*small mess up in the messages referring to basil as a "her"*
I texted nali to see if she wanted to come over because i didn't see her after school, but ofc she was with trey. Already skipping class on the first day ? what a bad influence. If her parents would've known she forgot about basil they would've ben furious. But i wouldn't snitch of course. I hate how she pushes me to the side when she's with trey. Like i don't even matter now that he's around. Which leads me to believe she will never feel the way i do. But i'll try to have hope. She signs her name after every text. She swears she was born in the wrong century and wishes people still wrote letters. So she turns her texts into her letters. It's pretty cute i think. But personally that's too much work. She probably won't even come over later. That's if we are being honest. But maybe I don't know.
7 pm I was sitting in my room reading my favorite book. The stars and the blackness between them. When i heard a knock on my door "Hey Bitchhhhhh i missed you" It was denali. Shit she actually came and i look a mess. "oh hey...uhm im sorry i look gross right now". I struggled trying to talk to her. "Oh shut up. you look amazing always". She grabbed my hand as she was talking to me and pushed my hair behind my ear. There was a certain fondness i felt when she touched me. Like the ocean breeze. I love that she accepts me regardless no matter how much i think she won't. "thank you nali but look at me and look at you". i used to think that i wanted to be like her but the truth is i just want her. And i always will. She was there when auriela was diagnosed with epilepsy. And when she had her first seizures. She was always there for me and i was always there for her. Like when her parents got divorced. And her mom remarried. We stood by each other's side through it all. I looked at her as she sat there on my bed next to me scrolling through her tik tok. "Denali?" i whispered to her. "what's up" she looked up at me and said right away. "Have you ever felt like you loved something so much but could never be open about it" i hoped she wouldn't catch on "Yes, yes i have." i sat there and wondered for a minute what she could be talking about. "And what's that...". i asked her as i traced her name into her arm with my finger. " it doesn't matter.." She paused. "how was your first day though". She changed the subject. Why would she change the subject. What was she keeping from me. We tell each other everything. Unless. She's holding in the same secret i am. Maybe she is just like me. Or maybe i want so much for her to be like me that i'm just making scenarios in my head. Who knows.
