BEFORE IT SINKS IN (ONE-SHOT STORY)

BEFORE IT SINKS IN

It was on Sunday, are usual date-day. The sun is just perfectly hitting on us, not too bright and hot. And the tree as our shelter for this picnic day.

Matteo is laying down on my lap, pretending to sleep. How did I know? Dahil pagalaw-galaw ang mata niya at panay kurap din nito. Gustong gusto niya kasi na hinihimas ko ang buhok niya kapag matutulog.

I chuckled because of his clinginess.

I just wore a white and a light blue fitted dress and a white shoes. I let my brown wavy hair down and let the wind ruffle it. And my cute-little boyfriend matched his outfit with me. He asked me what I was wearing so I sent him a picture and I was shocked when I saw him wearing a plain white t-shirt partnered with a light blue khaki shorts. He was wearing a denim jacket but he took it off to cover my thighs.

"Babe, I have a question." I said.

He didn't respond and I felt him stiffened, trying not to make a move. I just laughed and hit his arm.

"Come on, I know you're awake." Pag-amin ko.

Agad naman siyang napabangon at lumingon sa akin nang naniningkit ang mata. "How did you know?" Tanong niya.

"You're so obvious kaya! Your eyes were moving around." I just laughed at him.

"Oh, I can't be an actor. So what was your question about?" Pagbalik niya sa tanong ko.

"I was curious lang to what is your plan for us in the future.. you know. Like our f-family? I-If you can see me as your.. uhm.. wife. Since we've been together for years already. If you ever have a plan lang." Kabadong kabado ako sa isasagot niya.

He chuckled first before turning his back on me. Then get one strawberry in the basket before sitting beside me. His head on my left shoulder while biting the fruit.

"What was the point of making you my girlfriend if I plan to marry someone else? Of course, babe, it's my dream to have you as my wife and the mother of my children. Is 7 kiddos would be enough?" He asked seriously.

"Seven?! Nahihibang ka ba?" Napalingon tuloy ako sa kanya.

Akala niya yata ganoon kadali manganak. Napapanood ko minsan paano ilabas ang sanggol sa ari ng babae at talaga namang nakakapag pabago nang isip ko kung mag aampon na lang ba ako o hindi na mag a-anak.

"Isn't seven your favorite number? Six boys and a princess. What do you think?" Pinipilit niya pa.

"Iba na lang pala gawin mong ina ng mga anak mo!" Sigaw ko.

"Are you sure?" He said with a teasing smile.

"Joke lang pala. Pero hindi ba pwedeng bawasan? Baka naman maging losyang ako sa pito." Pagmamaka-awa ko sa kanya. Ayaw ko ng ganoon!

"I know, babe. I was just teasing you. Your body will decide how big will be our family."
Sabay halik sa aking sentido.

"After we get married, let's not rush having a baby. I want a year with you as my husband first."

Gusto ko muna maranasan ang buhay na may asawa bago maging ina. Alam ko kasi na mas malaki na ang resposibilidad kapag nagka-anak na kami. Syempre gagawa rin muna kami ng family planning bago ang lahat.

"Okay. We'll be each other's baby first."

He was the only one I could think that I want to spend the rest of my lives with. I would do anything for that to happen. Masyado ng matagal ang pinagsamahan naming dalawa at hindi ko rin maisip na iba ang kasama ko kapag ginawa ko ulit yon. It just felt wrong.

At alam kong may mali na rin akong nararamdaman sa relasyon naming dalawa.

One time umuwi siya sa condo naming dalawa na parang pagod na pagod. Hindi makausap ng maayos at tila may malalim na iniisip. Syempre tinanong ko siya pero laging sagot niya na pagod lang sa trabaho. I know that it was a lie. And it hurt me that it was so obvious that he was feeding me lies.