TW: Swearing, mentions of death, mentions of self harm and mentions of abuse
Katerína's POV
The Order, along with some others who aren't in the Order, were stood outside of the great hall, while Snape was inside ranting about how Harry Potter was somewhere in the school and other sh*t.
We were supposed to do this dramatic entrance at some point in his speech. In the process of waiting, I felt nervousness rush through my veins. All of my life, I lived up to the usual Slytherin stereotype. Cunning, always breaks rules, prideful, and as most would think, evil. I was a death eater for God's sake.
But all of a sudden, I got dragged away from a mission and just magically became the good guy overnight and betrayed everyone I grew up with as well as everything I was taught my whole childhood.
How was I supposed to reveal myself to a whole castle-sized school of students and somehow convince them I am no longer on You-know-who's side? What were the Slytherins going to think? What was Snape going to think?
My hands started shaking at the thoughts and questions running through my mind. I didn't even know they were shaking. That's when I was snapped out of my thoughts when someone grabbed my trembling palm, braiding their fingers with mine.
I looked to my right, locating a certain frizzy haired brunette, staring at me with sympathetic eyes as her mouth was curved into a small smile, attempting to comfort me, to calm me down. Hermione looked down at my hands, scanning her eyes up my forearms, that were not clothed or covered, seeing each and every scar. Seeing the mark I've been trying so hard to get rid off.
Her caramel brown eyes lost the sympathetic look, being filled with sadness and pity. Her smiling lips fell down into a frown. I could see the Granger girl's mouth gape open, wanting to say something, but ultimately decided against it.
Then I remembered all of those times Hermione wanted me to open up to her. Even before we were friends, or dating, which I mean by the three nights we spent at the hospital wing. And even if we were broken up, I decided that it was finally time that I tell her about my past.
"My father, Emiliano Alvárez, killed my mother on my birthday when I turned eight years old." I suddenly spoke, trying to say it fast yet clearly. The curly haired brunette looked up from my wrists to my face, her eyes wide with shock, though I continued on.
"He got sent to Azkaban right after, leaving me with my aunt." I looked down to my feet, my face a frown as well. "He also abused me all of my life." The memories of every time he hit me, every time he used a spell on me, every single f*cking time, rushed into my mind, replaying itself repeatedly.
"I used to think that it was normal, and that every parent does that to their kids, since I grew up with death eaters surrounding me. But after I moved in with my aunt, I somehow still thought it was normal. I didn't want to believe my father cared about me so little."
I looked back up again, my eyes locking in with the glossy caramel brown ones of Hermione. "I would tell myself that it was his way of showing love, but that was a lie. I just told myself that to feel better when in reality, I was just his little punching bag."
One single tear escaped the Granger girl's left eye. "And after I realised he doesn't actually care for me, I started hating him. But most of all, I hated myself, for trying to make that b*stard seem like a good person."
I looked down again, breaking our eye contact. "After he got out of Azkaban, he forced me to become a death eater. Although I didn't want to, You-know-who threatened to kill my father. And even though I hated him so f*cking much, I somehow still cared and refused to let harm come in his way."
I clenched my left hand into a ball, trying to ease some of the anger I felt towards this man I called my father my entire life, flashbacks of my darkest times appearing in my brain. "And that's when I hated myself the most. I still cared for that man even after all he's done."
My head twisted back up, locating more tears on Hermione's rosy cheeks. "So I started... cutting myself, because I thought I deserved it. Not just for forgiving my father for all he has done, but also for actually allowing myself to become a death eater. Become evil. Become like him."
My lips were as thin as a line, having nothing more to say. I stared into Hermione's mesmerising eyes, somehow calming me down from the thoughts of my past flashing in my mind. All of a sudden, the girl let go of my hand, throwing her arms around my neck.
It took me by surprise at first, but I slowly wrapped my arms around her waist as well, snuggling my head into the crook of her neck, enjoying the warmth she was providing me, not just physically, but emotionally.
"I- I'm so sorry that happened to you." Hermione uttered out, pulling out of my embrace to look into my, once again, bright green eyes. "No one deserves for that to happen to them." She said once again.
And even if I was feeling the complete opposite of happy right now, I still found myself smiling at how much the Granger girl cared. Though, at the moment, it was probably not the best time, or place, to tell her about my whole past, the urge overcame me and I don't think I've ever felt better.
970 words
YOU ARE READING
Happily Ever After | Hermione Granger [3]
FanfictionKaterína Alvárez, after going on her first mission with the death eaters, accidentally met up with her once girlfriend, Hermione Granger. After being dragged into a h*ll of an adventure, trying to find the horcruxes, and destroying them, they got ca...