Chapter Eight

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Dipper and Mabel sat in the back of the car munching on corn chips, and Y/n sat up front helping Stan navigate through all the traffic safely. They were all very confused why there was so much traffic for such a small town, they were just trying to get home from the grocery store.

Mabel stuck some chips into her ears like earrings and laughed. "Nacho earrings!! I'm hilarious!"

"That's debatable." Stan grumbled, honking his horn. "What's with all this traffic? And why is it all..." He looked closer at the cars in front of them, only to realize they weren't cars. "Covered wagons?! Oh no. No no!!!!" Stan panicked, looking around them. It startled Y/n, who was half asleep.

He frantically shifted gears and veered onto a smaller street. "Not today. Not today!!!" Stan looked awfully paranoid. He slammed on his breaks right before hitting some townsfolk dressed as pilgrims. Without hesitating, he put the car into reverse and slammed on the gas pedal.

"Grunkle Stan, what's going on?" Dipper asked worriedly as they whirred backwards.

"We gotta get out of here, before it's too late!!!" Stan screamed. He slammed on the breaks once more to prevent hitting another wagon. "They've circled the wagons!! We're trapped!!! NO!!!"

It was true, the wagons were circling around their car. Y/n was worried their groceries would go bad, who knew how long they'd be stuck there. A cow peered into the car at Mabel, and she pressed her hands against the window.

"I have a good feeling about today!" Mabel smiled.

"I don't..." Y/n muttered under her breath.

"Why didn't you tell me they were all wagons??" Stan yelled at Y/n. "You know my old man eyes aren't good for much!!"

"I could hardly tell myself." Y/n yawned. Stan glanced over and saw the huge dark eye bags under Y/n's eyes.

"Yeesh kid, how late have you been staying up?" Stan grimaced.

"I haven't, I just get these horrible nightmares and they won't let me sleep a wink." She mumbled.

"You need to take a nap when we get home."

"No, I'm fine, I promise-"

"Y/n, you're going to take a nap when we get home." Stan ordered. "You look like a zombie. It's horrifying. You'll scare away my customers"

The twins hopped out of the car, and Y/n and Stan decided to get out as well.

"Man, look at the town." Dipper's eyes wandered, taking in all the changes that had been made. Mabel awed at how different everything was.

"Ugh, it's pioneer day. Every year these yahoos dress up like idiots to celebrate the day Gravity Falls was founded." Stan grumbled, catching up to the twins.

"Welcome to 1863!!" Tobey Determined waved his arms at them, holding a handful of old newspapers.

Stan rolled up his sleeve and shook his fist at him. "I will break you, little man!!!" He snarled, causing Tobey to frantically run away.

"Come one and all to the opening ceremonies!!" A voice rang out over some loudspeakers.

"Grunkle Stan, you coming??" Mabel turned excitedly to her uncle.

"No thank you!!" Stan grumped. "Just remember if you come back to the shack talking like these people, you're dead to me."

Dipper squinted an eye and turned to Mabel. "Thar's a carpetbagger in the turnip cellar!" He swung his arms, speaking in a southern accent.

"Well, hornswaggle my haversack!" Mabel joined in. They both spat on the floor in sync before running away laughing.

"DEAD TO ME!!!" Stan shook his fist in the air.

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