detention || minsung

11

⚠️TW/ intrusive/suicidal thoughts, self harm⚠️

"this is the new house?" junhan asked as they stepped out of the car.

"this isn't a house it's a mansion." jooyeon spoke, impressed.

"yeah. felix and hyunjin are inside, you guys can head in. i'm gonna bring the boxes over." jisung smiled.

"isn't that a lot?" jooyeon frowned.

"not really, and if anything i can make multiple trips." jisung assured.

"okay...see ya later ji." junhan gave his brother a hug.

jisung got back into his car, placing a cigarette between his lips and lighting it before he drove off. he rolled his window down, sighing as the breeze hit him.

⚠️

"is that all?" changbin asked as he brought in the last box from jisungs car.

"yeah, thank you." jisung smiled, taking the box from changbin. he carried it up to his room, setting it on the floor by his bed.

"sung come eat!" felix called up the stairs.

"i'm coming, one sec!" jisung called back.

jisung walked through the hall, bumping into someone.

"watch where the fuck you're going!" he snapped.

"YOU ran into ME. not the other way around." minho scoffed. "how annoying, gosh i hate you."

jisung rolled his eyes, marching down the stairs. he slumped down in his seat, rolling his eyes.

"woah, whats wrong?" felix asked.

"he doesn't know how to look while he's walking." minho spoke as he sat down.

"can you shut the fuck up? you're so fucking annoying." jisung rolled his eyes.

"be careful baby, if you keep rolling your eyes they'll get stuck like that." minho snickered.

"i hope they do, so i never have to look at you again." jisung rolled his eyes once again.

"okay ji, chill." felix sighed.

"whatever." jisung mumbled, picking up a slice of pizza. he slowly ate it, hating that he could feel minhos eyes on him.

everyone carried on with their conversations, jisung just eating in silence. he felt sick, he needed to leave. he wordlessly stood up, walking quickly up the stairs.

"ji wait!" felix called after him.

"felix i need to be alone right now." jisung spoke, keeping his voice down.

"okay...please call me if you need anything." felix sighed.

jisung wordlessly walked up the stairs and to his room. he sighed as he took a seat on the bed. he looked around, letting out a shaky breath. his eyes welled up with tears.

he hated it.

god jisung, why the fuck are you crying? what the fuck is wrong with you? such a fucking crybaby.

"shut up." jisung whispered, squeezing his eyes shut.

his tears began rolling down his chubby cheeks,
one by one.

he took a big breath in, trying to shut out anything his mind was saying as he took a deep breath.

you have a balcony, just jump off of it.

bash your head into the wall.

grab the blade.

go on, what are you waiting for.

you're a worthless bitch.

your own parents didn't even want you.

everyone would be happier if you just disappeared.

jisung could barely breathe, getting up and rushing to his bathroom. he pulled out a pretty floral box that he had hidden under the sink.

he took a blade out of it, rolling up his sleeves. he unwrapped the gauze that minho had wrapped around him earlier.

he quickly, and roughly began dragging the blade across his skin. he felt his breathing calm, the crying slow, and the thoughts quiet down.

he sighed, laying down on the bathroom floor.

🌙

"where'd jisung go?" junhan asked as felix sat back down.

"he just wanted to be alone...he seemed upset." felix frowned.

"is that a good idea?" junhan quickly asked.

"what do you mean?" chan asked.

"felix is. that. a. good. idea."

"junhan. i know you're worried, i am too. but he asked for space and we have to respect that." felix sighed.

"...okay..." junhan spoke quietly.

once everyone finished eating they all went to their rooms, feeling drained from the day.

junhan hesitated for a second, going over to jisungs room door. he slowly opened it as he knocked, peeping his head inside.

"hey jun, everything okay?" jisung asked gently, looking up from his phone.

"yeah, just wanted to come check on you." junhan sighed, walking into the room. he shut the door behind him, taking a seat next to jisung.

"thanks kid. i'm okay." jisung smiled, pulling his brother into a hug.

"okay." junhan smiled, feeling relief wash over him.

"how about we go downstairs and watch some movies, and then bake a cake at midnight?" jisung smiled.

"our tradition!" junhans face lit up.

"it's been too long since we've been able to do it." jisung chuckled.

"let's go! can jooyeon join us?" junhan asked.

"of course, now let's go." jisung smiled.

a/n: i'm a whore for angst but the next chapter is going to be so cute.