Only Ocean

When- Laura?

"Yes?"

"Oh my god, is it really you?"

"Actually , I think this is the wrong number-"
"No! it's Alex!"

Oh my god.

"Turner?"
"Yeah! This is Laura, right?"
"Yeah, yeah it's me. Surprise." I say with fake excitement.

I give I'm guessing that he most likely knows me by my voice, we've known each other long enough. Since 2000, it's been a long time and we used to be inseparable.

Like I said, I still did miss him all while I was mad at him.

A person really does change when they lose a certain someone.

"I didn't think you'd ever call again. I— I've missed you."
"I almost didn't."

I'd ran out of things to say, he was silent. Something, anything.

"So, how's the tour?
"Oh, it was good. Bigger crowds definitely and a little stressful. How are things on your end?"

Nothing like yours, how does one make their life sound fun with it being full of nothing?

"Stuffs being happening." I lie anyway.

"I'm uh, I don't know if you still live Sheffield but I'm in town and maybe we could— you know, have a drink or something?"

He's in Sheffield?!? Like right now?!

"You're in Sheffield?"
"Yeah, we're on a little break from the tour. Gonna be here for a week."

When I had first thought about calling Alex I'd never expected for him to be here, I never expected for him to answer in the first place. It all hit me at once, though I should've known there'd be consequences to my actions.

"Hello? Laura? Up for drinks?"

Was I? No. Though I do miss him, and is still mad at him. I shouldn't go actually, It'll just bring anger over me.

"Sure." I let my heart answer instead of my head, idiot.

"Okay, cool. You still live in that apartment?"

As embarrassing as it seems I do, I've been here for years but it feels so comfortable and nostalgic that I don't want to ever leave. I know I will have to eventually.

"Uh, yeah. Apartment C15."
"Yeah, I remember it."

"I'll come pick you up, unless you wanna have a drink at your place?"

A drink at my place actually sounds nice and more comfortable than going out. I'll tell the truth.

Alex and I were always out having fun, at parties and clubs, at pubs drinking our days away. He was always fun to be around and I would spend most of my time with him, even if he'd been in the studio, I'd stick around like his little annoying cousin.

Since Alex left I haven't been as active as you'd imagine, after he left I didn't want to go out at all anymore. It all only reminded me of him, of us.
Imagine 4 months of that, more to be added.

"My place is fine."
"Okay, then is tomorrow good?"
"Yeah."
"Then tomorrow at 8."
"Tomorrow."
"Have a good night, Laura."

I'm counting on it..

"So long, Alex."

I could feel my heart beating out my chest, I was sure he could hear it too. I'd just hoped it wasn't loud enough to hear at all, the way it'd been rapidly beating was honestly concerning and I'd hope he hadn't caught on.

*

The sun was rising but I wasn't, matter fact I hadn't closed my eyes once. Too many thoughts to think about I think it's given me 5 headaches by now.

He was on my mind like crazy.

It felt like my crush had just asked me out, but in a nervous way, it's hard to describe.

This feels like how when Alex had first asked me to hangout with him, so many years ago.

It's a little exciting...

*

After I did eventually fall asleep, I woke up again around 1 in the afternoon. Though, This wasn't new to me.

My uncanny sleep schedule didn't interfere with my plans though, I had to at work at 3 in the afternoon just to get off at 10.

I work as a writer, barely any income but it's the only job that I can manage in my state right now. I only made hours for myself to make sure i actually did it on time.

Most of the time I stick to the schedule, though this was something I'd taken up only a few months ago.

Before, I worked at a strip club.

I know that sounds weird for someone like me, but the someone now isn't the someone who I was before.

Put all that aside, Im going to have to cut it short to 6 since Alex and I are going out today. Meaning, I'll have to start at 2 rather than 3.

Then i'll have to get up now..