Maybe I'm scared ... Because you mean more to me than any other person .
You're everything I think about .
Everything I need .
And you're everything I want .
****
Chandler rushes to me picking me up in his arms. He takes off his shirt and wraps my arm in it. I'm still crying .. and so is Chandler.
" B-Baby... I'm so s-sorry. " I say .
He takes me to my bed and lays me down.
I look at him. His eyes are red from crying. He holds my arm. I look into his eyes.
" I'm so sorry Beth ... I'm sorry . " He says crying .
" Why Chandler . You have nothing to be sorry about. "
" Why would you do this ?! " He yells.
" I-I don't know ! " I scream with anger.
" It's because of me ! Isn't it ?! " His voice cracks.
" Chandler no . Okay ! It's not . My life is fucked up and you know it . " I start crying more . " I'm getting abused Chandler ... My mom ... I haven't seen her for I don't even know how long ... Veronica ... she's my best friend ! I want to help her when she's feeling bad but how can I help her .. when I can barely help my own damn self ! "
He looks at me . " Beth .. I'm sorry "
I just look away and cry.
He pulls me back into his arms and comforts me. " Chandler. .. " I say quietly.
He sniffles. " Yes Baby .. "
" Help me .. "
He pulls me away from him. And looks into my eyes. " Bethany, I need you to listen to me... Doing this to yourself will not solve your problems . I'm gonna help you okay . I'm gonna be there for you when you need me .. I need you to stay strong for me. You may think your life is all messed up but it's not ... when I look at you .. I see a beautiful girl . She's happy .. and she's mine . I'm not going to let anything happen to you . You're my everything babe. I love you . And I don't know if you really believe I do but I mean it. I fucking love you Beth.
With all my heart. Forever and always . "
He says grabbing my face and pulling me into a kiss.
I pull away and smile.
" I love you more " I grab his face again and kiss him. This kiss meant something .
I loved it. I loved him ... he made me feel special . I don't want to loose him. I cant.
We pull away. " Want to watch a movie or something ? You know so we can get our mind off things for a little while " I ask him.
He smiles and nods.
I get up and turn on ' Expelled ' .
Oh my god I love this movie .
I walk back over to my bed and lay next to Chandler . He wraps his arms around me and I bury myself in his.
About half way through the movie, I feel my eyes getting heavy. Eventually I fall into a deep sleep.
