Twenty-three

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Y/n POV

I woke up at 8.30 this morning and surprisingly enough I got out of bed almost immediately, I stretched and fixed myself both coffee and breakfast before getting changed and going out for a walk in the cold while chatting with Matthew who couldn't understand that I could get ready and outside in 45 minutes, and I also invited him and Lizzie over for coffee at 11. I got back home around 10.30 and sat down on my couch to watch some criminal minds which is the series I'm currently watching, and very much obsessing over, and let me just say, I have a big fat lesbian crush on both Jennifer Jareau and Emily Prentiss and would let both of them do whatever they want to me.

Lizzie and Matthew showed up around 11 as we agreed, and I gave them the tour of my apartment and gave them both food and coffee before we sat down by the dinner table and started coordinating the Christmas dinner, which went a little like this.

"So, we've been thinking, as it is being hosted at our house, do you want to stay the night and just use the same room you used last time? And will you be sharing the room with anybody?" Lizzie asks me, and I take special interest in her last question.

"Yeah, borrowing the room would be nice, and if you mean me sharing with Scarlett then no, we are just friends, plus, I don't even think it's a good idea to invite her," Matthew questions my thinking and asks me to explain, before I even get to Lizzie explains how Scarlett was Alice's teacher as well, and of course, Scarlett could just be invited as Lizzie's friend but with the way Scar and I looked at each other at the winter fest it would be a bad idea, which I totally agree with.

"But then again, you could just not invite Jason and Alice," I suggest and Matthew looks at me.

"And when our mother starts asking questions about why our brother isn't there what are we supposed to say?" He asks me as if I had thought about that. I tell him that that is a fair reason and that I probably will need to speak to our mother about me and Scarlett's friendship so that she at least doesn't freak out when Alice or Jason says anything about it, but before I do that I need to talk to Scarlett about it.

"Look, I don't know, I think I'm just going to have to take it as it comes and prepares Scarlett for whatever could happen," I empty my cup and take some more coffee. "Anyways, that's my problem. What else are you going to do about tomorrow, like guest and food wise, and you know, space, cause mom and Jason are going to need somewhere to stay and there is no way in hell I'm letting them stay here again," I protest.

Matthew almost looks disgusted when I mention that Jason and mom will need a place to stay, and Lizzie places a hand on his to calm him down which he refuses and walks into my bedroom slamming the door behind him "Okay, what have I missed?" I look at her shocked at his reaction.

She takes a deep breath and wraps both her hands around her cup, "He is still mad at them for not showing up when you needed them, or at least your mother not showing up, and he is mad at himself for not listening to me about the pills and he is mad that it went as far as it went, and he's just angry, at the world," She says and looks down at the table.

"I'm going to go talk to him for a second," I say and leave her in my kitchen.

"Matt," I say and close the door behind me. He is sitting on the edge of my bed with his head hidden in his hands, he looks up at me and he is crying, "Matt..." I wrap my arms around him and he cries into my shoulder.

"I thought I lost you Y/n," He says, which breaks my heart, "When Ellie called me and told me what had happened I just, my world stopped and I thought you had died, and I was thinking about not ever seeing you again, and how I am the worst brother for not noticing that you needed help," He cries.

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