Calamity [Zarry Stylik AU]©️

Chapter 26: HARRY'S JOURNEY THROUGH LONELINESS

H,

Zayn showered in my bathroom, with the water scolding so he wouldn't catch a cold. I took out his clothes putting them in the washer to remove all the dirt and mud.

Meanwhile, I sat in my bedroom looking at my closet reminiscing on the previous four days and how intense they had been. I was feeling a mix of emotions: I was happy Zayn was with me, excited, overjoyed.

However, concerned, and anxious. As if I didn't know him or was afraid of him not knowing me.

I place one hand on my side, feeling the discomfort from my healing ribs. I breathe in and out, managing the pain to the best of my abilities, trying not to cloud my mind and judgement. The doctor did indeed tell me I would be needing the painkillers, but I had refused.

I stood my ground on that day.

"All right, Harry. From what I could see, everything is okay. Your wounds are healing nicely, and you seem to be on your way."

I remember exhaling relief and mum holding my hand tighter.

"Great," I replied. "Can I go home?"

"I would like to keep you under observation for today. I'll let you go tomorrow. Now, regarding your pain level..." The doctor grabbed a small bottle of pills from his pocket and rattled them. "I'll prescribe you these painkillers..."

"No," I cut him off immediately. "I don't want painkillers."

"Harry," Mum called me.

"I don't want them, mum. I'm fine."

"Harry, you have a few broken ribs. Painkillers will help you manage your discomfort." My doctor suggested. I looked at the small bottle of pills and felt uneasy. I wanted the pain. I wanted to feel something since I couldn't feel Zayn, I needed this tug at my reality.

"I have a friend who was prescribed painkillers when he broke his knee. He ended up addicted to those."

The doctor looked at my mum, who silently shook her head. I'm an adult they can't force me to take medication. The doctor grabbed his pad, scribbled a few things, and then ripped the paper out.

"I'll make you a deal: I'll give the prescription to your mother. If you feel you can't manage the discomfort, she can go out and get some for you. Fair?"

"Fair."

I looked at my nightstand, where I saw the little bottle of pills sitting there -against my wishes mum had bought them.

I reached over, picked it up and read the label for the one-hundredth time. No. I had been strong thus far and would continue.

I needed to keep this away from Zayn's sight, I didn't want to trigger his addiction or to feel tempted towards me. I opened the drawer, put the pills inside and close it silently.

These days, when we were apart, had killed me inside. We had spoken on the phone on that first day, for hours. About everything and nothing. It had been love and passion all that once.

I had never touched myself in such a way or imagined those scenarios. I cursed, gasped, and moaned with pleasure for someone who wasn't even there. I told things I wasn't even aware I was saying, completely controlled by my desire - I wanted him to just destroy me.

However, I had a chip on my shoulder. Something stuck in my throat. My spirit was rattled. So much so, that despite me knowing he was there, in my bathroom showering, that he had crossed a storm to see me, my pettiness would not allow me to let it go.

I could not forget how easily Zayn had given up his means of contacting me.

That was still stuck.

The following morning, I read and reread Zayn's message to me: