LOVERS, JJ Maybank

002 i can feel all my bones

LAUREN
MILLER
—

    They need to calm down with the construction outside or I'll kill someone, what they be thinking they're doing? I mean I hope it's some awesome castle or some shit I can hide in from my dad or everyone else. Or I hope it's some place I can lock up the people I hate so that I can live happily ever after for the rest of my life. So, last night, big bad idea going surfing during an hurricane, my body is aching as if I had fight Godzilla. I wake up maybe, twenty minutes ago, and every time I move or just breath my body cry out.

I jump when someone knock at my door. "Wassup?" I ask Lily when she enters my room in her pyjamas. I Burt out of laugh when I see the small kittens holding cakes. "You look ridiculous you do know that right?" She sigh at me, but I still see the small smile crook on her lips.

"And you look like shit so I wouldn't talk too fast." She sit on the edge of my bed, and I feel like I've been hit by a bus. "So, tonight, dad and my mom are going at a meeting for the electricity and stuff I didn't understand, they probably won't be there until tomorrow morning as usual." I raises my eyebrows at her, meaning I agree with her. "And I'm going to sleep over at Sam's. So, you're going to be alone."

"Cool. Super. That's nice."

"Please, don't do anything stupid."

"Don't worry, I'm a big girl, I can handle myself." I teases her. She shake her head laughing quietly.

"Right, okay. Just at least be careful. By the way, Maggie called this morning. She invited you, again, to that party tonight, at the beach. You should go." She tells me, and as hard as it is and push myself out of my bed, groaning.

"Nah, y'know, I don't- pfff it's stupid anyway, who does parties on beaches now. Ew" I turn my head to look at her, she raises her eyebrows at me, and tilt her head. "What it's not like I'm going to miss anything, it always end the same way. Kook and Pogues together it's like Second World War. Or third I don't know whatever."

"Lauren, I think you really should go. I've heard that if you lock yourself up to much in the same space, your brain can petrified and you die. Well, you get depression before and then you kill yourself. I wouldn't want that for you, y'know. So go, please." She plead standing up. "And don't drink too much."

"You need to stop caring about me, I'm the big sister here. Okay. Chill out mama." She laugh and leave. "I'm serious!" I shout, leaning. Then groaning, I shouldn't have move it hurts like a pig—but she's right you should go.

And see JJ? Or Pope? Or worse John b? Hell no. This is too much, and I'm not ready for anything like that. And I'm not going to die in my room, I got a job now, I'm going to work everyday and it's going to be so much fun. And I like being alone, maybe not in Thai big ass house I feel like an asshole living here when some people can't even eat. So, well, I could re-watch 'a breakfast at Tiffany's' or the best show ever, which is 'new girl' and watch my husband for the millionths time. I mean, we do have the same last name, it works. Nick miller my best man!

And yes is fictional, but that's okay.

I'm going to be just fine. Here all by myself. As always!

+

    I've been watching New Girl all day, and I'm at season three already. I've been drinking limonade with the small bottle of vodka I had left in my room. Who's empty now...yay...anyway I'm bored, and it's been long. I've been doing this all day, like I said, and my body isn't hurting so much anymore. I've been taking pain killers and I know trick so, it's alright. But damn, this is sad. I look over the movie room, and sigh. Click pause over the episode I know by heart anyway.