MWH one shot - I Can't Run Anymore

I Can't Run Anymore

I finish my beer and signal for the bartender to bring me another one. As I wait for my refill a girl with reddish brown hair walks over to me.

"You should probably pace yourself Bellamy" Echo says wryly taking the seat next to me.

"It's only my second one" I answer too quickly.

She lifts an eyebrow at me and shrugs.

We sit in silence for a few moments as I realize I have been at school for a few months and she is probably the closest thing I have to a friend here.

We haven't hooked up, in fact I haven't hooked up with anyone because I can't shake the memories of Clarke that are still burned in my brain. We met in one of my classes and I just find her easy to talk to.

Echo breaks the silence, "You know drinking alone isn't going to help."

"I'm not alone, you're still here" I quip.

"What are you doing to yourself?" She asks instead. "You can't run forever " she points out.

"What are you my personal Yoda now?"

Her lips twitch, "Hardly, I'm much better looking"

"I'm not good company tonight Echo, you deserve to have some fun." I try to give her an easy escape.

"We're friends right?" She says looking at me.

I nod in confirmation.

"As a friend" she continues, "I've gotta be honest with you. You need to stop running and face it already because the situation is not going to go away."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know damn well, I am talking about her!"

"She's moved on. She has a live in boyfriend!"

"Only because you walked away. You didn't even say good bye to her, you just left."

"You don't know what you're talking about!" I glare at her.

"Really?" She snorts "Then why haven't you changed the cover photo on your phone?" I flush as her words hit me full on. " I know you Bellamy. You and I are exactly alike which is why we are friends. It is also why I can tell you with complete confidence that you are full of shit!"

"Hey!"

"You have been miserable these past few months. Stop running and go tell her how you feel" she says softly patting me on the shoulder, "She is your sister's best friend, you can't avoid her forever." She adds sagely and gets up to leave.

I grab her hand, "You know, I think you and my sister would get along really well, are you sure you don't want to come with me to the wedding? As a friend?" I ask.

She shakes her head. "You need to get your shit together first Bellamy. Besides I'm still dealing with my own issues" she pats me on the shoulder as she gets up to leave.

"Later" I say.

She nods and heads over to some random guy at the other end of the bar. I shake my head, I am not ready for that yet.

I pay my tab and walk back to my dorm trying to ignore the voice in my head.

You know she's right Bellamy.
God I hate it when she's right.

I get back to my room and decide to checkout my Facebook at 10:30pm on a Friday night. I shake my head.

I am so pathetic right now but I am not going to check out Clarke's status.

I swear

Octavia has posted a couple of new photos so I click and the first one is of her and Clarke and him. She tagged them both in the photo and, unable to stop myself I click and start checking out her timeline.

She looks good...she looks happy.
Without me...
I look at the picture again and my fists clench involuntarily.

I decide to torture myself further and click on his timeline.

After a few minutes I decide I really need to stop and force myself to log out. I pick up a book and throw it across the room so it hits the wall with a loud thud before it falls to the floor and drop my head in my hands.

In that moment I realize Echo is right. I can't run anymore, I have to go back to face them. To face her.

If I have any hope of getting Clarke back, and yes I want her back, I am going to need to go back and deal with this.

And just like that I make the decision to take some time off of school. My mom won't be happy about it though.

I fall into bed fully clothed trying not to picture her in my minds eye snuggled next to him.

I groan in frustration and get up and text Octavia, telling her I will be at her party next week and I can't wait to see her.

Now, I just need to get through this week and then decide what my next move is going to be...