Matcha Latte

epilogue.

[ EPILOGUE. ]
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kira.
sunday, 5:05 p.m.

the elevator gave a single, crisp ding as its doors slid open for me to step out. the lobby that revealed itself before me was unfamiliar, even though i had just walked through it yesterday. i hadn't had the time to register each and every detail about the old wood paneling and leather couches, not with tears fogging my vision, anyway.

it was the day after i had officially left rue behind. i'd put a decent road distance between us already, having crossed the border to the u.s. a little bit after midnight yesterday. now that i was taking a break from driving the thoughts started to flood my mind, and most of them weren't good.

i should never have bothered running away from home for the summer, not even to catch a break from everything. it ended me with this, like this. and i hated every second of it.

it had been clear from the very start that, if i should end up starting anything here, it would be temporary - shorter than temporary: momentarily. something so short-lived that it only felt like one singular memory when looking back to it. just a fond memory with a stranger in a city more than a thousand miles from home, no strings attached.

fuck 'no strings attached'. i felt like every single string of myself was attached to this place, this town, its people. rue. her especially, she had all the strings of my heart.

she had snuck her way into my heart, toyed with it and spun all its strings around her hand. she could do whatever the hell she wanted with it and i wouldn't care because it would be her doing it. she could rip it out of my chest, throw it onto the ground and stomp on it and i would still end up thanking her.

sure, we didn't know much about one another, not about the backgrounds or even her favorite color. but have you ever heard of love at first sight? soulmates? i would like to think that she was my soulmate. my person.

she was so easy to be around and talk to, she'd kept me here longer than i had intended, anyway.

on the first night we met each other, that friday, i'd simply stumbled into that tiny coffee shop on the corner after that accident up the road. the driver had run into a deer and i was the first other person to come by. i called an ambulance and they told me something about first aid, that's what ended me all dirty.

anyway, as i was saying, i'd never wanted to stay in this city in the first place. my actual destination was a little further north. a friend's house in some forest in canada. i ended up here instead, which was considerably close to said destination but still. she was what kept me here, when i'd seen her that night she immediately sparked my interest.

the way she dressed, the way her curly and frizzy hair fell over her eyes when she was working so focused on orders. the way she smelt, dios, her smell was heaven. she was lemony fresh and smoky, but not my cigarette kind of smoky. she smelt like campfires and the ocean.

hell, she was the ocean. the way she moved with such grace and ease, i'd watched her surf and she made it look as if it were the easiest thing in the world when in truth it was pretty damn difficult. she was cool and refreshing, too. though, on the good days (which were the majority) she was really sweet and warm like one of her hugs. i loved her hugs.

i loved everything about her, if you thought about it. i loved her hair, smile and eyes. i loved her dorky-ness, her ability to listen to me and make me feel safe and comforted with barely any words. she wasn't the most outspoken person there was, that's for sure. she comforted people with her personality and mostly some sort of physical contact.

i loved her body, too. and the way she felt so good underneath my palms, her lips against mine. i loved the way she talked and all the noises i could make her make.

rue was my new favorite person; she would be until i died.

i had tried convincing myself on the way down south that it had just been a temporary goodbye. one that was only because of family issues, and those could be resolved. whenever said issues were gone i would simply return. and hopefully nothing would be changed until then.

after all, i had promised that i would be coming back... eventually.

the floors of the motel i'd spent the rest of my night at squeaked when i made my way up to the counter to pay for my visit. the lady behind the counter looked oddly similar to rue though i decided to simply not think too much into it.

there were many people with short, frizzy curls and eyes as green as emeralds, nothing special. the fact that they both had a mole on their right cheek, in the exact same spot, must have been a coincidence as well. for all i knew (which wasn't that much) rue didn't have any siblings.

"hi sweetheart, i hope you enjoyed your night? do you want to checkout?" i nodded, too perplex to register that this woman, even though extremely similar to her, wasn't rue. it was simply a person who happened to look almost identical to her. maybe they were some degree of distant relatives, or doppelgängers. i once heard that every person on the planet has at least three lookalikes.

anyway, i just slid my card over the counter into her awaiting grasp. she slid it through, a beeping sound following, then she handed it back to me while sporting rue's signature smile.

i blinked and shook my head to somehow get the odd resemblances out of my mind, this wasn't the time to think about her. not again. i was going to head out for the road and i needed to be completely focused for that; nobody would like me to end up in the hospital.

except for my brother, perhaps, but that wasn't important right now.

i thanked her before pushing through the spinning glass doors to get outside to the parking lot.

i tried convincing myself that i was simply missing rue too much already. there was nothing wrong about that, though. i had every right to miss her and her awesomeness right now. after all i had somehow managed to meet her, spend a great summer with her and then mess it all up by having to get back home asap.

oh, how i missed the way her warmth felt against my skin whenever we hugged. not even the warmth of my bike's tank after some decent usage could make up for that.

the sun was beating down on me as i slowly made my way over to where i'd left my bike in the middle of the night. i pulled at my backpack's straps once more before swinging my leg over the seat and steadying myself on the pavement.

the stand was kicked back up as i slid my helmet over my head. this reminded me an awful lot of the time i explained rue how bikes worked and what all she would have to pay attention to to it get hurt while riding with me.

rue had definitely been the best part of my summer.

i turned the key in the ignition, revving the motor before actually starting to move forward. i circled around in the lot, showing off a little bit (i couldn't resist, but i mean, try owning a bike and not showing it off, i dare you).

as i pulled back onto the highway i couldn't help but think about the way i associated rue with the ocean, the water in general. somehow i would like to say that i, myself, was the fire. i knew that, in general, water and fire weren't supposed to work out since the water would extinguish a flame and fire would bring water to a boil.

though, i would like to think that the two of us just found the exact balance between extinguishing a flame and bringing the water to a boil. the water was a nice, warm temperature while the flame was dimmed to not hurt the water too much.

i would try my best to keep my promise and return as soon as i could.

the sun had started to set when i finally got to a speed that i could hold for a longer period of time. the sunset reminded me of the time we spent at the beach. i think that day was my favorite of all, along with the night at the fair that later turned into her birthday party. our first kiss.

i couldn't help the huge smile that hurt my cheeks with them being squished together by my helmet. rue was my special someone, after all.

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