Akira Momoshiro - It wasn't planned like this (english)

Chapter 18

I closed the door behind me and followed Miyuki, who walked a few meters ahead of me. "Miyuki?" I stopped and hoped he would do the same, however, he kept walking. My flow of tears increased again. "Miyuki, I can imagine you're angry and never want to talk to me again... I'm sorry, I...", I started when he suddenly stopped. "I'm not angry." He turned to me. "I'm much more disappointed. Why didn't you tell us? Do you trust us so little that you won't even tell us your gender? Apart from the fact that you didn't tell us what Kayami did," came disappointedly from him.

Immediately, I shook my head. "It's not like that! I trust you guys!" - "Then why didn't you say anything to us? We could have helped you." I looked down at the ground. "I didn't want to lose you guys too!" - "What do you mean?" came questioningly from my colleague. "I...I've been playing baseball for a long time. Especially in middle school, I really enjoyed it because I had super friends and we were always a team. We were good, they even called me their lucky charm..." Because of the memory, a slight smile appeared on my lips just before more tears came. "Then what happened?" - "In that year's Tournament, we made it far. All the way to the semifinals. We really wanted to make it so we could part with a win, but we lost!" I felt Miyuki come closer and put his hand on my back to calm me down. "We were laughed at by the opponents. They said it was a miracle that we had even gotten this far. That a team with a girl could win anything at all...that's what they said. They said that we were probably just lucky. My friends believed them and blamed me for the end of the game. They blamed my gender..."

I took a deep breath. "I dragged down the reputation of the whole team, embarrassed them all in front of the other team, and because of that I lost everything... my friends, my place on the team, ...", for a moment I couldn't continue speaking because I was sobbing nonstop. "Do you think we would have blamed you for a loss? Or that we wouldn't have been able to handle the stupid talk from other teams?", he asked me calmly while running his hand over my back. "I don't know...I didn't want to risk our friendship. And I didn't want to lose it all again...." Mentally, I was still in the past when he pulled me into a hug. "You don't have to worry about that now. Calm down for now." I nodded and enjoyed being close to Miyuki.

After a while, I had more or less calmed down.We detached ourselves from each other. "Miyuki, I want to tell theothers." He nodded. "They should all still be in the dininghall." - "Thank you... can I ask you something?" He looked at mequestioningly. "Can you come with me when I tell them?" Again, henodded. I took several deep breaths until I took the first step and then walkedto our destination. We entered the room together and were met by astonishedlooks. "Aki!" exclaimed Kuramochi, jumping up to join me afterwards."Thank goodness, you're all right!" came from Maezono, who also cameto me. "How are you?" my green-haired colleague wanted to know."I'm...uh...doing okay," I replied uncertainly, which they noticed."What is it?" I took a deep breath. "I have something to tell youall. I..." - "Ah, Akira. Did you finally get around to tellingthem?", Kayami interrupted me. I cringed and instantly changed my place toMiyuki's right side to put more distance between myself and Kayami. My friendslooked at me in confusion. "What does he mean by that?" askedKuramochi. "I can tell you if you want, after all, Akira seems to have ahard time telling you. She lied to you guys." - "She?" -"That's right. Akira is a girl," he revealed to them, which broughttears to my eyes, as it had so many times before. They all looked at me."What does he mean by that?" I swallowed hard. "He's telling thetruth," I said curtly, looking down at the floor. I could hear surprisedsounds. "What?" - "I...I'm sorry!" After saying that, Iquickly turned to the door and left the room in a hurry.