Sea Traitor - BokuAka

21. Scales

Bokuto sighed, holding his headphones over Akaashi's ears. He had been getting glazed eyes on and off until he started throwing up earlier, shaking. His eyes hadn't gone back and he was trying to force them back to either of his normal states.

"I can't- I can't-"

Bokuto kissed his forehead. "Easy. If you get overwhelmed I will and it'll just end up a mess."

"It's really difficult to focus on fixing it when you keep talking!"

Bokuto just watched him. The whole thing with eyes confused him seeing as his eyes had only done this twice. He had yet to explain to Akaashi how it felt to be a human in a trance like that but that day would also come soon enough.

Akaashi finally relaxed and blinked a few times. "I think I'll keep them my natural black while we're here. It feels better."

"That's totally fine with me. I think it's pretty."

Akaashi chuckled softly.

"Do you think this is because they attacked and you got in the water?"

"I don't know."

Bokuto touched his arm. "Is tonight a bath night?"

"It may be."

Bokuto felt of Akaashi's cheek. "You're looking a little off. Let's get you in the water."

Akaashi moved Bokuto's hand away. "I don't want you helping me in or out of the water, you're not strong enough yet."

Bokuto frowned. "I can too!"

"No."

"Whatever." Bokuto stood slowly and walked even slower to his bathroom. His resting period would be up in a few days and he could start working again and actually watch things on TV and use his phone more. He was pretty excited for all of that even if his body didn't play a part in looking excited.

Akaashi slipped past him and grabbed a towel. Bokuto turned on the water and found the salt under his sink. Akaashi got undressed and sat on the side of the tub, watching Bokuto. Bokuto smiled and kissed his shoulder.

"You're so pretty."

Akaashi touched his cheek, smiling. He slid back into the water and his body slowly changed. Akaashi groaned in relief and stretched. Bokuto leaned over and watched as usual. "Kotarou?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you like to touch my tail?"

Bokuto flushed. "Wait really?"

"Of course. I feel like you'd be gentle with it."

Bokuto dipped his hand in the water and Akaashi flicked his tail up. All the dark greys and blues glistened in the yellowing light above the mirror. Bokuto ran his fingertips over the scales tenderly as to not hurt Akaashi. The tip of his tail fluttered and Akaashi shivered.

"Sorry!"

Akaashi smiled shyly. "It's okay. My tail isn't used to being touched. Not even by me. It's not that it's sensitive either, because it's not at all. It's just that your hand is so warm."

Bokuto chuckled. "Can I get in the water with you?"

"Will we both fit?"

Bokuto shrugged. "We'll figure it out somehow."

"Alright."

Bokuto stripped down to his boxers before sitting next to Akaashi in the water, Akaashi on his side. Akaashi laid his head on Bokuto's chest and moved his tail a bit. Bokuto kept touching the scales, admiring the colors and intricacy. He traced the scales all the way up until he got to Akaashi's hip, where the scales spread out more and more, trailing up to the bottom of his rib cage. Akaashi stopped his hand and just held it. "You okay?"

"Mhmm."

"Do you want me to stop?"

Akaashi just shrugged. Bokuto eased his arm around Akaashi's waist and held him to his chest. Akaashi's chest ached for a moment and he held on tighter.

"You seem upset."

"Just a little. It's not that big of a deal."

"I'm not having that. Why are you upset?"

Akaashi sighed shakily. "When they control me I can't see. I can't feel. I can only hear. It's scary and I hate it."

Bokuto nodded. "I get that."

"You do?"

"I do."

Akaashi stayed silent for a few minutes, stilled as Bokuto made circles on his back. Was being with him too much?

Bokuto shifted slightly.

"What was it like for you?"

"Really lonely."

"Lonely? That's all?"

Bokuto held onto Akaashi tighter. "I couldn't see. I couldn't truthfully feel anything. I could barely hear. My insides were cold and I couldn't breathe. Your voice was muffled, like you were several rooms over. My chest-" he shakily sighed. "My chest was so tight that I felt like all air totally left me and that I was drowning. When I was in the water it was so cold and I was still under their spell or trance or whatever and I really just wanted to die. I never want to feel that again."

"I'm so sorry."

Bokuto sniffled, holding on tighter to Akaashi. "Never use your gift on me like that unless you kill me."

Akaashi sat up hurriedly, pushing water over the side of the tub with his tail on accident. "I would never."

Bokuto put his hand to his chest, trying to breathe right. He kept stuttering breaths and gasping, crying. Despite the pain Akaashi fixed himself to look human and held Bokuto. He helped him out of the tub and rocked him on the floor, loosely draping a towel over himself. "I-I still have nightmares. They're so bad and I can't ever sleep right and you help so much but when I sleep away from you I wake up panicking because I don't want them to hurt me again."

"Kotarou. Hey, you're going to throw up. Take some deep breaths. I'm going to find out how to fix this."

"I just don't want them to take me again. I don't want to do that again!"

Akaashi gulped. "You won't ever have to."

"That's not true because you keep getting stuck and-"

"There is a rule that if a siren is killed the person who was saved or protected will never be hunted again. You won't be hurt again."

Bokuto shook his head. "I know they're going to get me again."

"I killed them."

Bokuto stared, confused. "What?"

Akaashi shakily breathed out. "They were my cousins. I taught them to hunt but they tried to kill you so I had to act. I was so angry that I just..." He looked away, ashamed. "Did it."

Bokuto's eyes turned from panic to worry. "Is that why you had scratches?"

"Yes."

"Are you okay?"

"Yes."

Bokuto nodded. "Good."

"You're not scared of me?" Akaashi questioned.

"No, never. It's shocking but they um... I don't know. It's hard to explain how I feel. But thank you for saving my life."

"I would do it any day." Akaashi's heart sped up. He would kill himself for Bokuto. When they were close he felt his heart ache for him, his body lighter and brain clearer. He would do what he had to in order to keep him safe.