In My Head

Chapter 1 - Obi-Wan

Author's Note: So, this is my gift for lore on ao3 for the SW Father-Daughter Appreciation Gift Exchange!

I've been thinking about this idea for a while ever since someone requested that I write a similar version where Luke is dreaming of Mustafar. Which I will write someday, I promise. :)

Enjoy the Leia-Obi-Wan and Leia-Vader bonding in here! :D

Also, this is part of the Star Wars Playlist Challenge hosted by Riftwalker on ao3. The song In My Head by Derivakat really fits this fic. 

There are three chapters, and I'll release them weekly on Sunday. ^-^

~ Amina Gila

Leia can never recall exactly when her nightmares began, only that it must have been when she was around three or four. Perhaps it was somehow connected to the first time she actually read her governess' mind. She only remembers it, because of how shocked the woman had been, and how her parents had been afraid for reasons she still can't understand. Sure, it's not normal, perhaps, to be able to intuitively understand the thoughts and feelings of others, but it's not a bad thing, either. It's helped her, made her more alert and aware. That can only be good, right?

The first time she had a nightmare was horrible. She can still vividly remember it, the bubbling, red-orange lava lighting up the background as the two men fought, wildly and viciously with bright blue swords. She can still hear the young man's screams as he nearly burned to death on the edge of the lava river.

Leia had woken up then, gasping and choking on sobs as she ran to her parents' bedroom and crawled into bed with them, trembling. She couldn't coherently even tell them what it was that she had seen, and her childish attempts at doing so had alarmed them so greatly that she feared she had, somehow, done something wrong by seeing it. Maybe they understood more than she realized and knew the significance of what it was that she'd seen. Even now, she doesn't know.

The nightmares never stopped, and there's always been a realness to them, a clarity of knowing that Leia can't shake off. They're always the same, or similar, never changing in content, and she knows that they are important somehow.

She has, over the years, been able to piece together somethings, and eventually, at Lola's suggestion, she scribbled down what she dreamed so that she could put all together. The piece of flimsiplast she keeps folded and hidden away from prying eyes. These dreams are hers, and she selfishly wants to keep them to herself. She's smart and intelligent, and she can figure it out on her own without going to her parents about it.

After the first couple times, she stopped trying to tell them, and she's never broached the subject since, something within her telling her that they are better kept to herself.

Someday, she will get answers. Someday, she will discover the truth.

***

Though Leia struggles against her captors valiantly, it's to no avail, and soon, she tires. She's tied to a chair, unable to break free, especially not on her own. With Lola having been thrown carelessly to the floor, she's alone. Completely alone.

She doesn't intend to doze off, but she still does, and images come to her in brief glimpses.

"You turned her against me!" the young man – Anakin, he is called – seethes, blue eyes flashing with fury and betrayal. Padme is lying on the landing platform, and somehow, Leia just knows that these are her parents and that this is how it call came apart.

"Anakin, my allegiance is to the Republic, to democracy," Obi-Wan snaps at him, hard and unyielding and equally angry.

She wants to cry as they attack each other, fighting with brutal relentlessness that terrifies her. No matter how many times she sees this, it will never get easier. It has never gotten easier over the years, and she doubts it will ever change.