Just the Beginning

12

ANA

I woke up today relieved it's Saturday which means no school. I didn't come back until late. Around 10pm I think. Jada was already sleeping. Her mom, Sarah, was awake though. Thank god she wasn't mad, just concerned and worried. I said I was sorry.

I can't stop thinking about last night though. I mean yeah, the fire was tragic. Still very upsetting. But Matt.

Gosh. I look at him and I just melt. I trust him. The whole gang thing terrifies me but I really trust he has my back. I do. I trust that. If he was going to hurt me, he would have done it when I helped him. Right?

I think he means what he says. I've never been more certain. I just feel connected to him somehow. I can't explain it.

I sit up to see I'm alone in Jadas room. I come to my senses and smell breakfast being cooked downstairs. Immediately my stomach rumbles. I haven't eaten since Thursday.

I grab my phone as I walk to the restroom.

Matt: Good morning pretty

Me: Goodmorning :) How'd you sleep?

Matt: Uhm, kinda rough but it's okay. How about you?

Me: Why rough? And tbh, same. I feel exhausted.

Matt: eh it was nothing. And how come? Just everything?

Not sure why but my gut tells me something happened when he got home. I can't just ask though. It's disrespectful. At least to me.

Me: pinky?

Matt: what?

Me: Like, pinky promise? Pinky promise it was actually nothing?

Matt: really.

Me: really

Matt: I don't want you to worry. I'm okay. Okay?

Me: what happened??

Right now I'm a bit nervous.

Matt: Me and Jack got into a fight last night. It wasn't a huge deal. Like I said, I'm fine. Just tired.

Me: omg. Are you ok? Seriously?"

I hear Sarah call my name for breakfast. I quickly stand and head downstairs. Plates are already made and the food smells so amazing. The three of us sit down at the table. It's quiet.

"So," Sarah clears her throat, "Ana, how are you feeling?" I just pick at my food. My stomach is rumbling, I'm hungry but I just... I'm not hungry either. I don't want to eat. I'm upset. "I was thinking we could go do some shopping today? Get you some clothes and some new things? Does that sound good?"

"Yeah- yeah thank you," I whisper.

"Is there anywhere you want to go?" Jada asks, "we could probably go by ourselves?"

I look up at Sarah who is staring at Jada, a small smirk fights its way to her face, "and take my money?"

"Well if you have cash we only have that much to spend. Can't go over."

Sarah scoffs, "well okay then. I only have like $200 but I think that'll be enough for clothes. Maybe a few miscellaneous items. I want you both back by dinner. 5pm. The latest. Understood? And let me know when you're leaving."

"Okay okay," Jada laughs, "come on, lets go get ready."

"She hasn't eaten-"

"Mom spending your money is more important." I can't help but laugh. Sarah too, she laughed as well. It made me nervous honestly, it was kinda snooty. She takes my plate and dumps the uneaten food in the trash before grabbing my hand and pulling me back upstairs.

"Tell me everything," she jumps on her bed, "what happened last night? Who was that kid at school? We never talked about that."

"He told me I was beautiful, we held hands," I smiled, "it was nice. He makes me calm. I uhm- I was actually wondering if I could text him and let him know where we're going? Me, him, you and his friend Chase were supposed to come over to my place yesterday but- you know."

"What? You don't have to ask," she laughs, "of course you can text them."

"And what I'm about to tell you, you CAN NOT repeat. You never heard it from me, understand?"

"What is it?"

"It's about that kid at school."

"Okay I swear," she holds up her pinky finger, "what is said on this bed, stays on this bed."