Definitely, Maybe, Sometimes. | ✔️ COMPLETED

Chapter Twenty-Four

It's Friday night.

The night before my mum is coming to visit. Jordan is sitting on my floor. Neither of us have made a sound since coming in here.

He picked me up from work, kissed me, and walked me back. But his mood is low and I'm too scared to probe him. He gruffly takes off his boots, chucking them against the wall.

The thud is the first sound that's been made. It seems oddly symbiotic.

"Sorry." He's embarrassed. "I didn't mean to throw them so hard."

"It's fine." I say, taking my shoes off and neatly placing them under my desk.

It's awkward. The air is thick and horrible. He clearly has something to say but won't. I'm too tired to force it out of him. I feel drained.

"I'm tired." I say, pulling my pj's from under my pillow.

"Yeah." Jordan says, watching me whip my top off and put my pjs on. "Me too."

Once dressed, I sit back down on my bed and look at him, a little defeated. "I'm too tired to beat around the bush. Just say what you want to say. Get it over with."

He levels his eyes at me. "I don't think you should introduce me to your mum."

"Why?"

"What will you say to her? I'm the guy you're fucking?"

"No." I rub my eyebrow and look away from him. "I don't know. My friend? The guy I'm dating? Why does it matter?"

"Because it matters to you."

"I'm so confused." I huff, falling back into my pillows. I can't look at him whilst we have this talk. "You like me, right?" Jordan says nothing. "If you don't like me I'm going to have to pull out a tiny shovel and start borrowing my way into the ground. Seriously, if not for anything but the sheer embarrassment for how I've been behaving the last two months."

Jordan's voice is deep. "I like you."

"Oh. Good."

"But I'm not boyfriend material. And you? Well, you're special."

I feel my eyebrows raise in worry. "Special, like, I eat my own hair?"

He sighs. "You're smart and beautiful, funny and interesting. I can talk to you all night long. You're the perfect girlfriend. I, however, am a shit boyfriend. I'll be a shit boyfriend."

"But..." I start. I'm so confused. His train of thought makes no sense. "I'm not asking you to be my boyfriend? Besides, that's a stupid label I don't think we need. I'm not interested in anyone else. I like spending time with you. I don't see why we need to label it just because my mum is coming."

"Because if we don't she'll just see me as the guy shagging her daughter. You need her to like me or you won't be able to like me." He takes a deep breath. "And she won't if she thinks I just want an easy lay."

I chew my lip and let the room stay quiet for a moment. "Jordan?"

"Yeah?"

"She already knows about you."

He groans.

I start to panic. "I tell my mum everything. She knew there was a guy, I don't know how she knew but she did. She's my best friend, the person I go to for everything and she isn't going to judge you. She knows I'm an adult now. You don't have to meet her if you really don't want to. But I won't lie to her about who you are."

There's a silence. A stillness. I don't know if he's mad at me. I don't really care. I don't understand his reluctance. He acts like my boyfriend, behaves like my boyfriend. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, it probably is a duck, right?