⑭︎Chapter Fourteen⑭︎

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"Okay, darling."

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"I wish I was normal." Saiki whispered to himself. He was sitting on his bedroom floor, laying his back against his bed and looking up at the ceiling with his eyes closed. Saiki was having another depression episode, he was doing way better now that he was in a relationship, but he still wasn't average. He still had his powers. Saiki furrowed his eyebrows and clenched his fists tightly. "I hate this." He growled to himself. He opened his eyes and stood up, walking out of his room and to his bathroom.

Saiki closed the bathroom door as he entered. He leaned over the bathroom sink and held onto the edges strongly. 'Good grief.' Saiki thought as he looked up at himself in the mirror. "You aren't normal." He told himself. "You're a freak." "A monster."

Saiki opened up his drawer full of razor blades and quickly grabbed one. He pulled up his sleeves, just to see all of his scars from the previous times he hurt himself. '...Looks like I have no room here.' Saiki sighed and took off his shirt.

'It has been a long time since I tried a different spot.' Saiki threw his shirt on the bathroom floor and put the blade up to his shoulder, he sliced it across and hissed in pain, but he liked feeling the pain, if he felt emotions, he was close to being normal. Saiki continued slicing his shoulder, blood dripping down onto his chest and arm.

Once he ran out of spots on the first shoulder, he moved onto the other one. 'Pain is normal, I'm normal.' Saiki reassured himself. The only time Saiki ever felt like he was like an average everyday teenager was when he hurt himself, it was sad, but it made Saiki feel better about himself.

Saiki then ran out of spots on the other shoulder, he didn't wanna stop, so he looked around his body, trying to find a new spot. He decided on his thighs and took off his pants. Blood was all over Saiki and the bathroom floor, he didn't seem to notice it, he only focused on pain.

Saiki sat down on the edge of his bathtub and sliced one of his thighs with his razor.

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Saiki was on the bathroom floor, covered in oozing cuts. He was surrounded in blood, and he was practically drenched in blood besides his head. Tears rolled down Saiki's cheeks and onto his chest, mixing with the red liquid all over him.

"I'm normal." He silently cried to himself.

Saiki felt horrible, he didn't know what to do, he just sat in agony both physically and emotionally. He could barely move, he didn't even know if he could clean himself up. 'Good grief, I need help with this.' Saiki thought. His bloody arm shakily went into his pants pocket and pulled out his phone.

Saiki opened Toritsuka's contact and hit the call button, putting his phone up to his ear.

It rang for a minute, Saiki not knowing if Toritsuka was still awake since it was around midnight, and then he heard the ringing stop. "Hello...?" He heard from the other end, Toritsuka sounded tried.

"Hey Reita, did I just wake you up?" Saiki quietly asked. "Yeah, but it's okay. What's up?" Toritsuka yawned. Saiki hesitated telling him for a few seconds and then sighed. "I...hurt myself again. Badly." "...What?" Toritsuka sounded more awake now.

"Could you just come over and help me clean up?" Saiki mumbled. Toritsuka was quiet for a bit, and then spoke again. "...Yeah, I'll be there soon." Saiki sighed in relief. "Thank you." "Of course, I- I love you, Kusuo." Toritsuka stuttered before hanging up. Saiki put his phone down onto the floor, making sure to not get it covered in blood and he had a small smile on his tear-stained face. '...I love you too, Reita.' He thought.

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It was the middle of the night and Toritsuka was wearing pajama pants and a t-shirt, with an open hoodie over it. "Please be okay." He whispered to himself as he approached Saiki's front door. Then, he knocked.

'The door is unlocked, try to be quiet and meet me in my bathroom.' Saiki told Toritsuka telepathically. Toritsuka quickly opened the door and looked around. It was dark everywhere, except for the bathroom light shining from under the door. He walked up to the bathroom quietly and then gently knocked on the door.

'...Is it okay if I come in?' Toritsuka asked. 'Yeah, just...don't freak out.' Saiki responded. Toritsuka cautiously opened the bathroom door and entered. As he closed the door behind him, he saw a horrifying scene in front of him.

Saiki was laying in the bathroom floor, covered in blood. Cuts were all over him from his shoulders to his thighs. "Holy shit!-" Toritsuka almost yelled. "I said don't freak out." Saiki murmured. Toritsuka was speechless, he was on the urge of puking.

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Saiki lay in his bathtub naked, relaxing and cleaning himself off, the bath water turning red around him. Toritsuka sat on the edge of the tub looking at Saiki, with no words to say and counting each cut and scar on Saiki's body.

"Kusuo...you really should stop this." Toritsuka squeaked out, his voice cracking. Saiki stared at Toritsuka and huffed. "I know. I just feel like I'm a normal person whenever I feel the pain." Saiki explained. Toritsuka's eyes glistened sadly. "You're normal to me." He whispered. Saiki closed his eyes and let himself sink slightly into the bath water.

"I would hate if one day I went to hug you...and I went right through you." Toritsuka said. Saiki opened his eyes and looked genuinely concerned for once. "That'll never happen, Reita." "Promise?" Toritsuka asked. Saiki smiled, "I promise." Toritsuka smiled seeing Saiki smile, it seemed contagious, probably because it was never shown.

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After a few hours, Saiki was all cleaned and bandaged up, laying in his bed under his blanket, Toritsuka right beside him, holding his hand tightly and Saiki rest his head on his boyfriend's shoulder. Saiki was sound asleep, and Toritsuka was almost about to pass out too.

"I'll always be here for you, even if I'm not great at comforting people, I'll still be here." Toritsuka yawned out. He breathed in Saiki's scent and kissed him on top of his head.

"Goodnight."

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