[ BETRAYAL ] | GL |

Chapter 1

I was staring at him in silence as he was speaking, i was trying to convince myself not to pull out the pepper spray i had in the pocket of my jumper and to not spray it right into his fucking lying eyes.
It was all his fault.
He did that to me.
He is the problem, not I.
Why wouldn't anyone believe me?
I was the victim, not him.
Why did they made me come here and apologize to him after all he had done to me?
I just want to leave.
I stood up from my place as i wasnt able to look into his face.
He was my first boyfriend, i dont even know if i can call that this way, but before him i had only girlfriends.
They treated me better than he ever could.
Let's say he was just a mistake, a moment of weakness.
Men are mistakes.

He grabbed my wrist and pulled me back on the seat.

- I am not done yet speaking. If you want it or not. Or do you want your family to see these photos?

He said, he stared straight into my face, into my eyes. That look, and that fucking smirk. My eyes started to burn, i felt a tear roll down my cheek. I guess it was stronger than me.

- What do you want from me?

I asked trying to sound calm, but my voice was shaky. I was scared. Scared of him and because of him i was scared of every fucking man on that fucked up planet.

Why can't I just disappear?
I want to be gone so badly.

- You do exactly know what i want.

No. Just please not that. Not what i thought about. I glued my gaze on the floor, then  i placed my hand over the bruises on the other which he left on my body.
I'll never forget that.
I will never forget how he raped, tortured and abused me.
And yet my family made me come here and apologize for faking. They think he didnt do it. Why can't they believe their OWN daughter?
I looked back at him, paralyzed with fear i couldnt move an inch as i saw him with that fucking smirk on his face again.

- So you do remember huh?

That didnt sound like a question. Then he placed his hand over mine.

- Let's go.

He pulled my hand but i tried to remain in place. Just dont move.

- I said let's go.

- No.

I said sternly this time and looked up at him, meeting his angry gaze.

- Your parents said you're here to apologize. Do it properly and stop being so stubborn.

He said as he pulled my hand harder, that time i had to get up, not from my own will.

- Let me go.

I said but when he wouldnt let go of my hand i started to yell. People at the restaurant just stared at us, assuming i am drunk. But i werent. People think its better to keep on their own business and not intrude others, they even let abuse happen. They ignore it all.
My face burned, i cried, as he dragged me out on the street and tried to push me inside his car.

- Hey! You!

Someone yelled. I couldnt see who, my vision was foggy because of all the tears.

- Yes you! Let her go!

The same person yelled, then i felt them grab my arm gently and pull me away from that fucked up psycho.
The person was a girl, surely.
After a moment i regained my vision as i wiped my tears.
Yeo-jin stood there with his jaw clenched as if he recognised that girl, he havent even said a word, got into his car, shut the door closed and drove away.
I turned to face the girl but she was faster.
She is beautiful.
I think she is my age.?

- How are you feeling? Did he do something to you?

She asked as she held onto my arm. Then she saw the bruises, but she didnt want to ask about them, i think.

- I am okay.. i guess, I'll better go home.

- You cant go by yourself!

She protested.

- Its dangerous, what if he comes back, i wont be there to help you again.
Let me walk you home.

She suggested and grabbed hold of my hand, i've felt my heart sting. I've never thought id be holding hands with anyone after my previous 'relationship' experiences. If i even can call it that way.

- Alright..

I said. We spent the whole way to my home talking, as if we had met before. She surprisingly knew too much about me. She walked me to the door of my apartment, i thanked her for her help and she left.
As i closed the door of my apartment and entered the kitchen all the questions had flew around my head like wagons on rollercoaster or like the bees in the hive.
All in the same time.
Do i know her?
Who is she?
Why did she knew so much about me?
From who?
From where?

I went to take a bath, i was still frustrated about my 'meeting' with Jin all the memories from the time i was with him were going all around my head, i couldnt forget it.
It's too much for me.
I turned my sight onto the razor that was laying near the sink. The thought of slashing my wrists so hard i bleed out in seconds was bigger and stronger than me.
I grabbed hold of the razor and as i was about..
My phone rang.
Intruding my not yet succeded nor failed try to leave that world in peace and honor.
I wrapped a towel around myself and took my phone.

Unknown number.
I picked it up.
The voice spoke.

- I saw what you were trying to do, dont you think that beautiful body doesnt need anymore scars than it already has?

The voice said through the phone. I stood there, i couldnt move. I slowly took my hand with my phone in it away from my ear and looked into the window.
I had forgotten to close the curtains.
Shit.

- Hello? Stop staring at me.

The voice spoke, i placed the phone near my ear again as i kept searchin for that mysterious person outside the window.
I couldnt see anything.

- Who are you?

I asked carefully. Trying to remain calm and composed.
But actually the fact someone was watching me through my own window right in this moment was terryfing and demolishing me.
From the inside.
The person didnt answer. The silence began to ring in my ears as finally they spoke.

- Let's say.. we've met before.

I didnt knew what to say.
Who is it?

- I asked who are you?

I said stepping closer to the window. My hands grip tightening on the towel i had wrapped around my body.
I had only the towel.
I've felt sick, that person saw me, saw me naked.
Disgusting.
Am i telling myself its disgusting to stalk on people or trying to convince myself i am disgusting?
Well, in fact i dont have to convince myself, i believe it already.

- I can tell you one thing...

The person said then there was only silence.
For ten seconds
Fifteen seconds
Thirty seconds
A minute had passed and the silence still remained, but i was still on line with them. I stood in place, i was too terrified to move, or even turn around.

- You don't have to be afraid of me.

The voice spoke again, but this time.. it was.. different.
I think.. like It came from behind me.
I wanted to turn around but suddenly everything that was a moment ago seemable for me started to become blurry in an instant.

My ears started to ring so loudly and intensely.

Everything became black.