If Only It Were Easy

1: Late Summer, 2019

How did you get here? You knew that he'd been unhappy with how you'd been less available lately, but this? You hated that everyone took pictures of everything and how a few words attached to a photo framed a certain way could cause chaos. You'd been crying for days already, and when you hear the keypad beep, you are lying on his side of the bed, wrapped in his favorite blanket, sobbing. You hear his shoe falls hit the floor faster than his normal pace as he makes his way through the apartment. He didn't even take off his shoes, you think as you sit up--your nose red, eyes swollen, face stained with tears. You look up into his dark eyes with a sniffle. No smile greets you. No words are spoken.

He takes a step towards you, grabs the tissue box off the side table and hands it to you. Hand shaking, you reach for it and the minute your hand is close enough, he lets it go, as if your possible touch is acid. You feel your breath hitch and you have to do everything you can to not crumble back down into the bed. "I'll be in the living area," he says flatly. You nod and blow your nose. He bends forward, takes off his Converse and carries them in front of him towards the living room. You hear the squeak of the arm chair and your heart aches. "He's sitting where I can't sit next to him," you whisper to yourself. You feel more tears start to roll down your face. Can you avoid going in there? If you fall asleep right now, will you wake up out of this nightmare? You hear him sigh deeply and know you are not going to be able to escape this. You let the blanket fall off you, wipe your face with the back of your hand and stand up. You take the 8 steps to the living area as slow as you can and sit across from him on the couch. Your heart breaks more seeing him hunched over. There'd never been a moment in your relationship where you doubted Yoongi's love for you, but looking at him through tear-filled eyes, sitting across from you with his face in his hands, it was obvious he didn't feel the same.

He lets his hands fall from his face and clasps them between his knees. He lifts his head just enough to look at you and you can see his eyes are now red. "You're only making this worse. I don't know what more you want to say, or what you expect me to say," he says, lifting his hands back up to rub and cover his face.

"I just don't understand why you can't believe me...I just don't understand this whole situation," you whisper.

"You're always busy. Barely able to take a phone call anymore, or answer texts immediately," he says, his voice barely audible though his hands.

"I'm just trying to stay busy, since you're busy. Y-you told me to."

"Busy with who, though?" He asks looking up at you. You see his cheek jut out from his tongue rubbing the inside of it.

"Yoongi..."

"Why?"

You slip to the floor and knee shuffle over to him. You take his face into your palms.

"Yoongi-ah, please," you beg. He knows that you detest begging, yet, here you are.

He shakes his head and pulls back from you.