"I'm fine Derek." Stiles chuckled. "Then show me your legs. Show me your back. show me your stomach... show me your fucking arms." Derek demanded his voice shaky and small but it was Derek's so Stiles body immediately tried to obey. But Stiles stopped himself. He put his head down. "stiles. Show me. Prove to me that your fine." Derek growled. "IM FINE DEREK! IM NOT FUCKING CUTTING!" Stiles screamed. "THEN SHOW ME YOUR FUCKING ARMS!!" Dereks screamed right back. "NO!" Stiles yelled. Derek's grabbed his And pinned him down onto the bed. He ripped his sleeve off. Derek looked at his arm. His pale, delicate skin covered in dark red cuts. Some deep some shallow. They overlapped. There were bruises and red marks, some were old. Anywhere from months to years old. Others... days to hours. Derek let go of his arm. He looked down at the boy underneath him. He was crying. He looked ashamed. "Are they everywhere?" Derek asked. ".....yes." Stiles mumbled. Derek slid off of him and onto the floor. "Do....jesus. Do you at least take care of them?" He asked. Stiles didn't answer. Which meant no. "When was the last time you cut?" Derek asked. "I don't know..." he replied. "Was it in the last hour? Last 30 minutes?" Derek questioned. "....yes." Stiles whispered. Derek kept his head up to stop the tears that were swelling in his eyes "I'm so sorry..." stiles mumbled. Derek took a moment before slowing getting up. He grabbed Stiles wrist and dragged him to the bathroom. The were no emotions in Derek's face. But Stiles was a mess. Red puffy pace with tears running down it. Derek helped him take off his clothes. It was the first time he had ever seen his body before. Despite everything Stiles refused to let Derek's service him. Even when Stiles said how much he wanted it he would never get naked. This was why. He helped Stiles up onto the counter. He grabbed a med kit. He opened it and found a alcohol wipe. "I can do that myself. Go sit lay down I'll be done soon." Stiles smiled warmly despite his raving heart and tears. "I can't trust you." Derek mumbled. Stiles smile fell. He had never felt so fucked before. He should have run when the altercation started he thought. Then this wouldn't have happened. Derek moved his body parts as he needed he used alcohol wipes, antiseptic and neosporin. Derek had to stop himself from gagging. Stiles body was so fucked. Not fucked. Derek snapped at himself. He "knew" that it was his fault. He hadn't treated him well enough. Maybe he hadn't given him enough physical affection. Maybe if he was around more he could have caught him sooner. Derek looked down. So many cuts. So many scars. As he looked at him he felt a rush of emotion. Of guilt, and despair, and anxiety, and pain. And as he had done all his life he took those emotions and made them into anger. Anger that surged through his veins and into his fist. He slammed it against the wall leaving a big hole. The loud band and crash scared Stiles he shook and flinched. Derek looked at him with anger filled eyes. But when he saw him. Looking absolutely terrified. He was shocked. He pulled his fist out of the wall and rapped his arms around the trembling boy. He held onto him. As he violently cried. After sometime Stiles stopped. Derek helped him put on more comfortable clothes And helped him onto the bed. Stiles covered his eyes as he cried. Derek felt helpless, he couldn't see the signs and Stiles had to pay for it. He grabbed Stiles face. "I'm so sorry." Derek mumbled. "It's not your fault!it's my fault! I fucked up." Stiles cried. Eyes still covered. Derek grabbed his hand and pulled them away to look at him. "Don't say that. It's not your fault. I'm sorry I wasn't-" stiles cut derek off "don't be my dad... don't make me feel worse about doing this to you then I already do. You were enough! You ARE ENOUGH DEREK! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry I cut myself!" Stiles cried. He sat up and scooted away from Derek. "I didn't... mean to be like that. I know this isn't about me! I love you Stiles." Derek said tearfully. They sat in silence for a minute before Stiles mumbled "I love you to...". Derek put his hand down in-front of him. "Can I touch you?" Derek questioned. "....not right now. I need a minute." Stiles replied. Derek pulled his hand away. "I understand. Do you want me to stay or leave?" Before the words could even sit in the air "don't leave!" Stiles blurted out. "I need you to stay with me. Okay?" Stiles muttered. "Ok... I'm here. Tell me when your ready to talk." Derek said. They sat in silence for about 10 minutes before Stiles broke the silence once again. "I want you to hold me now." Was all he said. Derek took off his shoes and went to the center of the bed. He grabbed stiles be the leg and the shirt into his chest. "I'm not mad at you." Derek whispered in is ear. Stiles looked up at him "I know.." he mumbled to him. anyone with functioning eyeballs could see how handsome Derek was but stiles saw so much more. And he knew what Derek was feeling even with no super powers. Stiles scrunched up his face. "Let it out..." Derek mumbled as he held him. Stiles cried harsly into Derek's chest. "I've got you. Shh..."
