The Aftermath of the AFTERMATH ( The kids )

If loving you is wrong

Lianna

It's been two months since i said those things to Mo and he won't even look at me . I don't even know why I'm so sad and hurt we don't even go together. I stopped texting Malik . He was trying to talk to me but I honestly wasn't interested. I mean he's good conversation and he's cute but he's not Mo.

Flashback to summer

" Come outside please. I just need you." I said as I sat in my car crying.

" what's wrong LiLi?" Mo said into the phone with his deep voice.

I could tell he was sleeping .

" Open the door." I cried .

When he opened the door he just looked at me because he had never seen me cry ever but I felt so safe with him that I didn't care that he seen me crying. He actually cared about how I felt or how I would feel. He just cared if I just wasn't okay. And with him, it was okay for me to just be and feel however and not be okay , as long as I was with him.... As long as I was in his presence it was always okay. If I just wanted to sit there, we would sit. If I wanted to talk, we wold talk . If I needed to vent, he would listen.

He didn't have a shirt on and I looked at his body and it was nice. He tucked my wild curly hair out of my face and behind my ears. He then wiped my tears away and then just hugged me so tight as I cried . He let go and grabbed my hand and led me to his room . I sat on the bed and he went and locked the door and took my shoes off . He grabbed a shirt from his third draw, grabbed a chair and sat it right in front of me , sitting in it backwards . I remember this day so vividly because I watched his every move and studied him. He looked me in my eyes & I just cried.

" are you ready to talk , LiLi?" He said just above a whisper.

I shook my head yes and closed my eyes so tight as tears fell down. When I opened my eyes he kissed my forehead and my tears and then wiped them away.

" I saw him.. I saw the boy who tried to rape me at the party when I went to go visit my grandparents. I saw him. I saw him at the store with a girl and a guy and he acted like he didn't remember me but I saw his face, he remembered exactly who I was and I saw that scar that I left right above his left eye when I hit him with the chair that was next to the bed to get him off of me. I saw him and I actually got scared like... like Killa isn't my father . Like I'm not Lianna Brown. I'm his daughter I need to protect myself. I represent him!"

" what store? Lets go now. He's dead" he said getting up and grabbing his gun from his shoe box. " I swear imma kill that bitch ass Nigga. Let's go NOW Li . Now !!" He yelled.

" No Mo please. Just no. Just come hold me." I cried.

I felt so weak like I couldn't protect myself. I wanted people to know my name and see me how they see my father just not with all the stuff he has done because I knew I would never be about that life and he would never let me but I wanted that respect and that fear kind of I just wanted people to know not to fuck with me .. and they do, but not this kid at the party I mean he really tried to rape me and at first I froze up just like I did tonight at the store seeing him.

I laid down on Mo's bed and he laid down beside me and just held me so tight. Like I felt so safe. No one could ever make me feel this way, so safe and it's like I hated him for making me feel this way but I loved this boy but I couldn't let myself show it because I just couldn't be weak for him . I couldn't let him know how weak in the knees and open he has me. He should know because he deserves it, he's so good to me . Here I am 2 am showing up unannounced while he was sleeping and he's just here for me.