"Yeah, and then she did the cutest thing in the world!" Shawn exclaimed telling a story about his 4 year old daughter, Olivia.
"You should bring her next time, baby." Camila stated. Shawn stopped talking and cocked his head to the side. "Who?" He asked obvious to what she was saying.
"Olivia."
"I don't know. I don't think it's time for that." Shawn said. He wanted them to meet, he truly did but then there was a part of him that told him not to. There was a small part of him that kept telling him the way his life was, practically living two life's, that was fine.
Camila sat back in disappointment. She had been dating Shawn for about a year now, specifically ten months, and has yet to meet her. She hasn't even seen photos of the little girl. The most she knows about her is that shawn had Olivia when he was 17, and that her mother, Hannah, had left the the second she could.
When Shawn had first told her, her heart had broke for them. To have never had been the family that they should've. So she understood the need to be so protective of her, she understood why they hadn't meet but now 10 months is she didn't. She had hoped that the constant reminders and bringing Olivia up in conversation would help Shawn to understand that she wasn't leaving, and that just like she loved her father, that she also loved his daughter, but it didn't.
He was still hesitant to them meeting. "How long is it going to take you to realize I'm not leaving and that I want this life with you? That I want to meet her, not because she's your daughter and that's mean as our relationship progresses, she's always going to be there. I want to meet her because she sounds amazing."
"I don't know. I- give me time to think about it."
"But you never actually give it any thought, shawn? How are we supposed to progress further into our relationship when you won't even let me see your daughter?" Camila asked, very clearly upset.
"I do give it thought, camila. It's not as simple as you think. You act like my life is how I want it- that I'm with the fucking girl I want " Shawn exclaimed.
"wow" camila scoffed. " I didn't know dating me was such a fucking problem. If you don't want me too meet your daughter because this isn't serious to you, then that's fine. That fine by me but don't sit here and act like it's for any other reason. Don't act like you care about this relationship since I'm not the "girl you want" !" Camila said throwing the napkin off of her lap and waking out of the cafe they were getting brunch at.
"Shit. Camila," Shawn said getting up from the table and following her out the door. "I didn't mean that-"
"You sure as hell seemed like it." She said, not stopping once for him to catch up. Picking up his speed he grabbed her arm pulling her slightly to face him.
"I didn't mean it the way it came out. I do care about you and I do see this relationship as serious, I swear to you on everything." Shawn said but camila yanked her arm away. He could tell that she was still mad at him, fighting tears back. He didn't know if they were tears of anger or sadness but it felt like a punch in the gut. He never wanted to be the person to make her upset, in any way. "Let me at least take you home, please?"
She didn't say anything, but she also didn't walk away so he took that as a sign to walk them to his car. He intertwined their hands together, and held on tight. She kept her hand as it was, but made no effort to pull it away.
The entire car ride back to her house was silent. Even when Shawn tried to start a conversation or tell a joke she was dead silent. That's when he knew that what he said- and the way he was acting when it came to the two sides of his life was creating problems, but he still couldn't shake the feeling of it being better this way. He still couldn't shake the feelings that what he said was true and valid.
Shawn pulled into Camilas driveway, "I love you. You do know that, right?" Shawn asked leaning over and pressing a kiss to her temple. She turned her head and looked slightly past his eyes into the distant, but she nodded with a small tight smile tugging at her lips, and that was enough for Shawn to know that she wasn't mad but also wasn't ready to get back into talking or anything.
"I know." She said softly, grabbing her purse and opening the door to her car, walking up the pavement to her front door.
Shawn put his car into drive once he knew that she was safely into her house, and started the drive to an all too familiar place.
Five minutes after dropping camila off was when he got a text from her, clicking the 'read' button on his car.
'I love you too.'
Shawn smiled, there was no text after that but it was enough, it was more then enough actually.
