Just when i thought life couldnt get weirder

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Smaaaalll warning for sexual jokes and rumors (for yk Bev and Vic)

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Smaaaalll warning for sexual jokes and rumors (for yk Bev and Vic)

Me and the rest of the losers were riding our bikes and just having fun. "Slow down dickhead!" Richie yelled as I sped up passed everyone. "Hi-Ho silver! Awaaayyy!!" Bill called out as he caught up to me. "Your guy's old lady bikes are to fast for us!" Richie yelled. "No! Your just slow!!" I yell back. "Your slow asshole!!" He shots back. "Says the guy who's 20,000,000 yards behind me!" I laugh out.

We finally get to the sewers and we are getting off our bikes and heading towards the big tube thing. "Do you think I could get ontop of that thing?" I ask, looking up to the top of the tube. "I don't know, I guess." Eddie answered shrugging. It wasn't like suuper tall but it would definitely take some work.

"That's poison ivy. And that's poison ivy. And thats poison ivy." Stan states, pointing to random plants. "Where? Wh-where's the poison ivy?" Eddie asked starting to panic. "What's poison ivy?" I ask, also panicking a little due to it having 'poison' in it. "It's just a weird plant that gives you a rash, and there's non here, not every fucking plant is poison ivy Stanley." Richie says, trying to reassure me.

"Well I'm starting to get itchy now..and I'm pretty sure there's someone stalking us.." I say, obviously panicking a lot. Richie goes over to me and puts his hand on my shoulder. "Your just p-panicking Vic, nobody's stalking us." Bill says with a slight sigh. "What about those antidepressants? You said they help with anxiety right?" Stan questioned me. "Yeah, normally, but like I said, they aren't ACTUALLY antidepressants." I say, still in a panicked state.

"You take antidepressants?" Richie asked. Honestly he was just surprised he didn't know about it. "Kinda- not really, but enough about the drugs I take, can we PLEASE focus on why we are here and the possibility of getting kidnapped." I say, sounding more panicked and unsteady. "We aren't going to get kidnapped vic." Eddie says again. "You never know!!" I say as I pick at my shirt. Richie and bill go into the sewers fully while me,Stan, and Eddie stay back.

"Aren't you guys coming in?" Richie asked us three. "Nuh-uh. It's grey water." Eddie informed. "What the hell is grey water?" Me and Richie say at the same time. "It's basically—piss and shit! So I'm just tellin you!" Eddie started. "You guys are splashing around in millions of gallons of derry pee, and most likely vomit to. So.." Eddie says with his normal sassy and angered voice. "AGH-" I yell as I cover every hole in my face. "Wha?!- are you ok?!" Eddie yells as he turned to me.

"Ew Ew Ew Ew Ew Ew!!" I keep repeating. I take a deep breath and look away from the sewer. "Ew." I say one more time. "Hm, it doesn't smell like caca to me chicos." Richie says as he smelled a stick with a bunch of 'grey water' on it. "Ok, I can smell that from here!" Eddie exclaimed. "It's probably just your breath wafting back into your face." Richie says smiling and making gestures with his hand.

"Have you ever heard of a staph infection!?" Eddie calls out. Though he says it like, 'infefin' for some reason. "Oh I'll show you staph infection!" Richie exclaimed with a evil voice. "Ugh this is so- unsanitary. Your literally- this is literally like swimming inside of a toilet bowl right now! And have you ever heard of LISTERIA?!" Eddie exclaims as Richie picks something up with the stick and throws it at him.

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