She belongs to me | Jasper Hale

Chapter 21

POV Jasper

"Darling, I would like to tell you about my past...", I began uncertainly and had to swallow hard.
Nothing was harder for me than thinking back to that dark time, the time when my other side emerged and became a part of me from then on.

I was still haunted by my cruel deeds and of what a monster I was.
However, I couldn't hide the whole thing from my Seraphina, she had to find out the whole truth about me and what I was capable of.

I pulled her back onto the bed and wondered where exactly to start until I felt her delicate hand squeeze my ice-cold one.
Her blue eyes looked at me with interest and understanding.
"You don't have to talk about this if you're not ready Jasper. I would never force you to", she said softly and I was really touched by her tremendous honesty.

My golden eyes darted across her beautiful face and finally settled on her eyes.
"No I'm ready, I want you to know everything", I finally said firmly, squeezing her hand back once.
I would never withhold anything from her or even lie, I wasn't that kind of person!

"As you already know, I was raised in Texas, Houston. I was born there as Jasper Whitlock in 1844 and at 17, under the wrong age, I joined the Confederacy to fight in the American Civil War", I began and tried to remember this time more precisely.

"What, really? No wonder you know everything so well on the subject of history!", Seraphina concluded immediately and a small grin spread across my lips as I nodded at her.
"How come you got accepted when you were only 17? Don't you have to be at least 20?", she asked me now and I just couldn't stop the wide grin that crept onto my lips.

"Even when I was a human being, I had the gift of being particularly persuasive. My current gift came about in this context", I explained to her and began to continue, "within 2 years, I rose to the rank of Major through my skills and was therefore the youngest Major of the entire army."

A wave of amazement and admiration emanated from Seraphina which made me proud and boosted my ego a bit.
"So, Mr. Major Whitlock, yes?", she grinned in my direction and I immediately felt an enormous pleasure when she called me that.
Not only I but also the Major himself liked this name very much and for a moment I lost my focus.

I looked at her soft lips that looked so very kissable right now and were also right in front of me. Her warm skin that only I was allowed to touch and her heart that only beat for me.
How good she would look beneath me and I would give her everything she asked of me.
The Major really wanted her to know about him, but I couldn't give him control just yet.

I quickly composed myself, "that's how it looks ma'm."
My dark eyes quickly turned golden again and I quickly dropped all previous thoughts to continue my story, "in 1863 I was to evacuate the city of Galveston, and on my way back I had my first encounter with vampires. Of course I didn't know that. All I saw were 3 women who might need my help."

Undecided and nervous, I now looked down again and closed my eyes briefly to calm down a bit.
"The women's names were Maria, Nettie and Lucy. Maria thought I could be of use to her and she bit me."

That part of my past would be burned into my memory forever, how Maria just threw me into my doom and I didn't have a clue about it at the time.
What would my life have been like if I had just kept riding?

"Oh... I didn't know that... I'm so sorry Jasper. I didn't know you were turned like that...", Seraphina whispered almost shocked.
I just shook my head and kissed the back of her hand.

"As a vampire I developed the ability to sense and manipulate feelings and emotions. My military experience put me in control of an army of newborn vampires. My job was to train the newborns for Maria and when they were no longer of use I had to 'eliminate' them", I finally admitted and like so many times before I felt guilty and saw myself as a monster.