today on 9 april 2023. He hasnt texted me. I waited and waited. Not even a "hi" or "how are u?" Maybe he just isnt intrested in me. Maybe he is more intrested in pretty girls. Not like me. Im just a casual person people say i am. I am that person that only overthinks. Not like those pretty girls that cares about how they look. That only walk around but still look pretty. I can never be them. How hard i try i will never be them. I will only be myself. U want to fall inlove with me? Than accept me for who i am.
I can fight with girls that likes him but i can never fight the girl he likes. The girl he wants. I will always lose in every way. Sometimes i also lose to the people that want him. Those girls like his ex? i know he doesnt want her back but we never know..what if his heart opens up for her again?
yesterday at night. I saw a tik tok that says "whenever youre in love. You will tend to do things you didnt even know u can do or would do." maybe thats true. Like look at me? i never know i can write things like these. I dont even know that im capable in writing long stories just about one guy. And i didnt even notice how insecure i was until i wrote this. Funny right? All i know is that whenever u love or like someone ur insecurities tends to grow more than usual. Like u will be more insecure than ever. Why? Because ur basically going against all type of girls and ur going against his type of girls. What i mean by his type of girls is example like the girls he like..his dream girl. Yes. Youre going against all that. But what can u do? especially when you dont even know his type. If u know obviously you would have tried ur best to be that girl he dreams of.
Trust me. I know its not only me going through this. And i know how much it hurts going through all this especially when u dont have anyone to talk to. No one to express this feeling to. All u do is underestimate urself and write in ur note about how u feel. If not note..maybe ur diary? or sometimes you even write it in your stories that u have published.
I know all girls that writes stories about boys, about love life and more. They always try to show other people what are their type of boys and what they want whenever they are in a relation ships.
But whenever they dont notice, you can do nothing but just act as if that was all just a story that you had in ur mind.
Just imagine a guy noticing your efforts and noticing all those tik toks you posts is about them. Then they will reply to ur story telling u how much they love u too..damn that would be a dream. I am actually very sorry if my story is soo messy and random in some parts but yeah😃
