3 ~ Farewell

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Pretty long ago, when my mom was around, I remember falling into a river during winter. It was the sudden shock that froze me, I couldn't move. It felt as if the air had left my lungs as I lay there motionless. Letting the ice-cold water rush past me till my mother came to pick me up.

That is how I feel at the moment, only this time my mom wouldn't be there to save me. The sea of kids surrounding me parted to form a path, I stared at each of them. Looking for some form of help, hoping that one may volunteer. "Come on dear." I swallow the lump in my throat as I hear Madelyn's voice echo through the microphone. My feet move slowly as I try to take in what is happening. It felt like I was in a terrible nightmare, only this was real.

I stepped into the aisle that formed between the roped areas, and everyone's eyes turned toward me. I remember my mom's words after I had fallen into that river, she said, "Brush it off, you're stronger than you think you are."

As I stepped closer and closer to the stage her words were all I could think of. "Y/n!" I hear someone screech. I slow down and turn my head to see Ana running toward me, streams of water dripping down her face. The two peacekeepers beside me pushed me to keep moving, but I couldn't. It was weird, but seeing her run at me, tears in her eyes, and pain in her screams, suddenly made everything more real.

It made me realize the true reality of what was happening and I felt sick. I watched as Ana screamed and fought against the peacekeepers who pulled her away from the stage. Her skinny arms hit against their backs as she demanded she is put down. I thought of running to her but knew I had to take my place on stage. Otherwise, there could be much bigger consequences.

"Come up dear. Come on," Madelyn said in such a calm yet eerie voice. My legs slowly shuffle toward the place she pointed, only then turning to look into the large crowd. Out of everyone there, all the faces in front of me. I can still spot Sky, his forest green eyes staring back at me, water forming.

"I bet that was your sister, is that correct?" She asked, holding the microphone up to my lips, waiting for a response.

I swallowed hard. "Yes," I say quickly.

She clapped her hands together and turned back to face the crowd, "Well isn't that delightful!" The people stayed silent, no one clapped. I knew what this meant, everyone knew what it meant.

Nothing could speak more than silence in a time of despair. Silence. It means that we do not agree. We do not condone this. All of this is wrong.

As I stand, something unexpected happened. I watch as the people of my district salute me, by touching their three middle fingers to their lips, and holding them in the air. It started with one, but as one copied another, everyone held it in the air. It meant admiration, a farewell to someone you loved. I had only ever seen it before at funerals. Which was ironic, since I felt as if this was mine.

The mayor ignored it, quickly stepping forward to read the Treaty of Treason, but I didn't listen to a single word. My eyes fixed themselves on a loose board that stuck out on the stage, my vision blurring.

The only other time I had felt this way was when my mom died, she was killed in a woodcutting incident. They later told us she probably could have been saved, but the guards who were watching her just let her bleed out. I cried for days, trying to convince myself it wasn't real. Even after my weeks of despair, the pain of it all would flood through me at random times, reminding me of all I had been through. My body is shaking as I sob.

I was deep in a depression for a long time after her death, but I was able to get over it eventually. My father, however, seemed to suffer more than I did. The district had given us a small amount of money so that we had time to grieve, it was enough for my father till he found work again. But he never did.

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