Coffee Addiction

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GLaDOS point of view

While Nolan was doing the advanced tests GLaDOS mostly concentrated on him and stopped sending in more test subjects. Well, the true sadness for GLaDOS lies in the fact that the one test subject they did send in right after Nolan finished the first test chamber was still not finished even after Nolan finished the Advanced test chambers.

Well for now, continuing to test the other test subjects is important. Even if the current one is fairly slow. "Good morning, Elyse Josephs. Testing will start in a moment." GLaDOS greeted test subject number 3. Test Subject 3, or also called Elyse, was still in bed. Sleeping.

GLaDOS gave a digital sigh after seeing no reaction for a good 3 minutes. She looked through her files and found a good audio file. [Play fork_scratching_plate.mp3] Why this monstrous file was on her computer, GLaDOS didn't know. Didn't really care either though. After a few seconds of the file playing Elyse jolted up, first trying to hit after her alarm, which was already broken on the floor. She tried to hold pillow over her ears to make the noise stop, but it didn't work.

"I'm awake! I'm awake! Just stop that shit!" Elyse almost screamed. [Pause fork_scratching_plate.mp3]. "Good morning, Elyse Josephs. Testing will start in a moment. I hope you had a restful sleep." Elyse slowly stood up, grumbling about how it's way too early in the morning. On another note, it was already 18:34 (or 6:34 PM).

"For the following tests, specialized protection gear is necessary. You can choose one of the following colours: Orange, blu-" "just give me orange" before GLaDOS could finish listing the colours they were interrupted by a grumbling Elyse. "Orange Aperture Science Long Fall Gear has been deployed to your closet. Please change into it so we can start testing." Elyse slowly walked towards the closet and took the gear out.

"While I put this on, can you make me some coffee?" Elyse grumbled while turning around the gear three times trying to understand which side is up and which down. "What am I? Your personal assistant?" GLaDOS replied slightly annoyed at this morning disaster. "The earlier I get my coffee the earlier we can properly start testing" GLaDOS gave a long sigh "Alright alright..."

Elyse smirked a bit and started to put on the gear. "Oh yeah, while you're at it, can you make me some breakfast?" Elyse said looking confusedly at the gear still trying to find out how the hell you were supposed to put it on before finding the areas where you could open it up. "It is past 6 pm. You had the past 10 hours to make yourself breakfast. You'll have to live without it." Elyse groaned "Can I at least grab myself like a sandwich to go?" GLaDOS having understood that human need sustenance to work properly agreed to that if reluctantly.

It took Elyse a bit to put on the gear. When she finished she grabbed herself a sandwich and the coffee GLaDOS prepared "Thanks for the coffee, you can open the door now." GLaDOS gave a small mental nod and opened the door. They waited a bit for Elyse to drink a bit more of her coffee before starting to explain todays tests "Today we will start testing our newest product, the Aperture Science Aerial Faith Plate. Tests might also include: Alpha Gel, Beta Gel, Storage Cubes, Buttons, etc."

Elyse pretended to listen while drinking her coffee. At one time during the explanation she looked shocked for a moment. She looked into her cup, turned it around and shacked it up and down a bit... Nothing. Elyse looked very disappointed. "Hey GLaDOS? Can I have another coffee?"

GLaDOS sighed and deployed another cup of coffee. Good thing was that the facility had coffee for years. They literally dedicated 0.1% of the whole facility to the production of coffee. And that may not like much, but in a facility as giant as Aperture.... So yeah, they have some to spare. Apparently the only thing the scientists fear is not having coffee for longer than like an hour.

"Thanks a lot." Elyse said while entering the elevator. "Thank me by actually preparing tomorrow." "I'd rather die." "GLaDly" Elyse wasn't fazed by GLaDOS' threat-pun and just continued sipping her coffee. "Here we are. Please start testing." GLaDOS said while opening the elevator doors to the first test chamber.

GLaDOS starts testing with Elyse looked around the room a bit, and walked over to the thing that seemed to be the aerial faith plate. She looked at it, then decided to step on it. A few milliseconds later a woman's scream could be heard echoing through the test chamber as she crashed into the floor.

After recovering from the shock, she stood up. "So that's why there is specialized protection gear." "Exactly. Please be careful from now on. Even if the gear can protect you from most damage, it can't protect you from everything." Even if GLaDOS tried not to laugh, they did let out a chuckle or two when Elyse was thrown through the air, though Elyse didn't seem to have noticed. Maybe it had something to do with them having been flung through the air, just a hunch though.

The testing continued with Elyse requesting a coffee about once every hour. GLaDOS got slightly annoyed though Elyse argued that otherwise she would just go sleep on the floor or something. And GLaDOS knew that she wasn't bluffing since the last time they didn't give her coffee she literally just started to become slower and slower until dropping to the floor and falling asleep.

"Hey GLaDOS?" Elyse called out to them in a questioning tone "I just gave you coffee three minutes ago." GLaDOS sharply replied, probably upset for being demoted to a glorified coffee dispenser. "I know, no need to get upset, that wasn't what I was going to ask either way." "Oh really?" "So, I know this question might be a bit late, but why are we testing these Aerial Faith plates anyway? They seem too dangerous to use anyway, and besides I don't really see what you would use these for. After all you guys already have the mobility gels which don't use any energy."

"The mobility gel might be cheaper in its upkeep, but in terms of production it is not the cheapest either. Additionally, in some use cases you want to be able to stop the upward propulsion, for example in an emergency. In cases like that the electric costs are usually worth it." GLaDOS explained. Or more accurately summarized the "uses" file that was in the folder for the aerial faith plates. The use files weren't mandatory, but if you wanted more funding, you would most likely have to write one.

"I guess they have their uses..." Elyse nodded slowly eyeing one of the aerial faith plates distain. Apparently she wasn't the biggest fan of them. Then she threw the cube on the plate which threw it onto a button. "Congratulations, this is the last test chamber for this course. You have qualified for the Advanced Test Chambers. Do you wish to proceed?" GLaDOS asked Elyse, looking at her through one of her countless cameras. "Is it mandatory?" Elyse asked. "No it'-" "Nope. Not doing it. I want back to bed." Elyse interrupted GLaDOS quickly. "You don't even want to know what it is?" "Noooot interested. Besides 'Advanced Test Chambers' already sounds enough of a pain the ass like it is. No need to explain it further to me."

"If you say so..." GLaDOS sounded a bit disappointed, but then opened the elevator. Elyse walked in and leaned on it's wall. The elevator stopped, and the doors opened to the 'private' chambers. "Please remember to stand up earlier tomorrow. And please don't destroy your clock this time either." "No promises."

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