Wasteland Baby (Jenna Ortega Oneshots)

-Empty- (J.O)

-Wasteland Baby-

-Jenna Ortega-

-Not Requested-

The sun didn't creep through your curtains, because you had them drawn shut too tightly, yet the unmistakable sound of your alarm rang. 

You opened your eyes, before turning your alarm off, you didn't have long to get ready, yet you didn't move, you thought about it, yet your brain didn't send the signal to cause your legs to lift.

The truth was, you were empty, completely, every day was the same. Get up, go to school, come home, sleep. You had practically no friends, very few passions or interests.

After about five minutes of laying in your bed motionless, you sighed and lazily rose to your feet. You had a shower, one longer than most. You hated school, and it was ending soon. So why weren't you happy?

You thought that you might have depression, but didn't want to self diagnose, so you pushed it to the side, after all, people have it far worse than you so why should you complain?

The least you could do would be smile and get through the day. You were barely able to do the latter, you cant remember the last time you smiled at something when in the presence of other people.

As for passions, that was a whole other story. You've tried a lot, music, art, writing. Some went further than others, art was out of the window pretty quickly.

Because that's how your brain worked, the second you weren't instantly good at something you gave up. You remembered a memory from when you were eleven. You tried to play Jimi Hendrix on your new guitar you had gotten, and when you obviously couldn't, you gave up.

If only your parents could see you now, or anyone for that matter, you had pretty much no friends, and even then the only friend group you were in treated you like a side character.

The worst part was you were too boring or uninteresting to get bullied. You got a few people calling you an 'npc'. You couldn't even argue with them.

Life was boring. School was boring, playing single player games alone in your room was boring. There were a surprising amount of people genuinely concerned about you than anything.

You had truly given up at this point, you were only a senior in high school and yet you felt like a machine, a cog or something similarly unlifelike.

You didn't want to kill yourself, you were far too scared for that, but the thought that you might just suddenly wake up one day dead wasn't one you'd be as scared of.

People tried to help, they really did, but after a while you got bored of that too, got bored that maybe you were just supposed to be alone.

You put on your clothes, clean but nothing too special, nothing that would make you stand out, nothing that would draw someone's attention or even make them think twice about you.

You weren't waiting to fall in love, you weren't expecting to be saved, you just wanted to graduate...and to be honest, you hadn't really thought of what to do after that.

You ate breakfast, sad and cold, just like you. Sure it was June, but you still felt cold and empty, like there was something missing.

You had to wait a further 10 minutes for the bus to arrive, and then it dawned on you that you had gotten out of bed, taken a shower and had breakfast, all of which took around 35 minutes, in complete silence.

So you sat in silence, for the next 10 minutes while you waited at the bus stop in hopes of something more, the something more that never came.

The bus pulled in, already full of friend groups and people generally having a fun time, despite it being 8am.