Behind the Time - Herophine

22

JOSEPHINE

I wake up with an alarm clock that is not mine, I open my eyes and then I realize it wasn't a dream, I'm in Hero's room, it's his smell... I feel a heat coming from my back, arms around my body, hugging me, I smile, I'm spooning with him.

There was no place I wanted to be more than here, cuddling up in his room... I can't get the smile off my face.

"What is so funny?"

Hero's morning voice makes me shiver, I turn to face him.

"How do you know I'm laughing?"

He turns off the alarm clock and hugs me again, pulling me even closer to him.

"It's been a while since I've been awake, just with my eyes closed feeling your breath..."

"Wow, that is weird huh..." Hero laughs at my comment.

"Stop making fun of me! Let me be romantic for once in my life!"

I put my arms over his and relax, we take deep breaths.

We were silent for a while... For a few seconds I feel like a normal person, a girl living a beautiful romance... But not for long, because fate sometimes plays tricks on us, and the peace I was feeling, it would soon be over... Hero breaks the silence.

"Is that how you slept with the little guy you met?"

I open my eyes.

"What did you say?"

I let go our arms, and turn to face him.

"Never mind..."

"No! I heard what you said very well! You know Hero, you're so funny... Until yesterday You were with a redhead... Okay, with a hot redhead, and you want to talk about the guy I hooked up with one night and..."

"Wait! You stayed one night... So you... Had sex?"

"What? That is a silly question, Hero!"

"Hey! You said you spent the night with him!"

"I wouldn't have told you that if I'd had sex with him, would you agree?" Hero shrugs... Are we really arguing?

"But what about you? How far did you go with the redhead? She looked pretty disappointed with you when she saw us..." He tries to speak, but I cut him off. "Let me guess... You guys were making out a lot, and you didn't make it to the end for some reason..."

"We just kissed..."

"Hm... Just... What about the other girls?"

At this point in the conversation, we were already sitting on the bed, still naked, I was covering myself with the quilt we slept on.

"Jô, you're funny! You ask me to meet other girls, live experiences, so that later, who knows, we'll be together in the end! If I had known that you would be upset because I did what you asked... I... "

"You what? Say it!"

"And you? Why didn't you hook up with other guys then?!"

"I STAYED  WITH OTHER GUYS!"

For some reason, after I said that, Hero stopped. He didn't look at me anymore, he got up, started picking up some clothes... Then he looked back at me.

"How many?"

"Not many Hero, I'm not like you!"

We're hurting ourselves... Why can't we ever get well?

"The difference between us Jô.... Is that I don't fall in love with the girls I date..."

And then... He comes back to reality.

"What is this alarm clock for?"

"Fuck! Evan's event!"

And he runs towards the bathroom, taking a towel with him. This is the perfect time to leave. I needed to take a shower, but I do that at the hotel, I need to get out of here.

I dress quickly, grab my purse. Hero still hasn't gotten out of the shower. I walk through the kitchen on my way out and see his mother.

"Martha!"

"Jô! I'm glad you're awake! I'm making coffee, I hope you like toast!"

"Thanks a lot but I have to run, my uber is outside."

"Uber? But, Hero can't take you to the hotel?"

"Oh no... He said he has a super important event today... I'd better not disturb... Also, we'll still be promoting the next After movie today, so let's see each other soon. Can you tell him I went to the hotel, please?

"Okay, I'll"

I hadn't noticed the tears falling all the way to the hotel, I just wanted to stop thinking about everything that was going through my head.

HERO

"What do you mean she left, Mom?"

I was still dripping wet, with a towel tied around my waist. As soon as I got out of the shower, I couldn't find her, I ran down the stairs desperately, almost slipping, and my mother told me that Jô has returned to the hotel.

"What happened son? Did you fight?"

"Oh mom, don't even try to understand this madness we live!"

"I'm not! I heard some of the craziness yesterday... Had to put my earplugs in."

I smile, even though I can't hold my good mood for that long, as the reason I'm happy right now is gone.

"Calm down, you will get right again! I know that!"

She hugs me, and I feel my world slowly slipping back into the place. My mom is great, I feel lucky to have her with me.

Worst day to have the Evan's award and the photos for the promotion of After. This was a very important event for him, I needed to be present. I was invited to accompany him and announce the winner of the prize he is running for, I hope he wins.

I can't stop thinking about our discussion this morning... Jô doesn't answer my messages... I won't keep running to her all time. All this we've been through is very tiring, why can't we be a normal couple and live what normal couples live? What prevents us from this? Everything is very unfair.

I get ready to meet Evan at the event. It will be at Soho House and Evan was excited.

"AAAAAHH I'm going to explode!"

"Calm down Evan! Everything will be fine!"

"I thought you were coming with Jô! I screamed with happiness when you told me that she was in London and at your house! Have you already had sex?"

I can't answer, I can't even process everything we've been through, that was the best night we had... I can't say the same about this morning.

"Hey, what happened?"

"Nothing Evan, I don't want to ruin your night. Enjoy it a lot because you deserve it!"

I hug my old friend, and he understands that I didn't want to talk about the subject, Jô.

Finally, the moment we've been waiting for has arrived. My name is announced, I go up on stage to say who was the winner of the night's prize:

"So, ladies and gentlemen, the Creator of the Year Award goes to my favorite friend Evan Mock!"

I knew he could do it, Evan goes on stage and exudes all the happiness in the world to the audience. I get a message from my agent and the producers of After who were waiting for me for the photos and videos of interviews we were going to do tonight.

That's great, me and Jô in this mood... I hope everything works out!



JOSEPHINE

I had already cried all I needed to cry, why can't we be a normal couple? Why is it so hard to experience true love without all this craziness going on between us?Wants to know? I do not need this! I want to be a normal person! I want to live normal things, I don't want to go through this pressure anymore! I love being an actress, but I love my happiness even more... And if fame doesn't let me live that... I'd rather... Get away from it... Yeah! I'm decided! After, the Other Zoey, will be my last works! I can't be like my sister... I don't want this Hero's life... I want to fall in love, I want to get a degree in something... I want to go shopping, be able to visit my friend, I want to go to birthday parties without being bombarded by people who follow me... I am out!

The makeup artist comes in, I get ready and we start the photos. We took a lot of pictures with the London landscape, I'm better, I don't reach for my cell phone until we finish everything. We tested many looks and did many clicks.

After a few hours, I heard that Hero was on his way, the studio we are at is close to the hotel where I stayed and close to his house as well. I know he was going to Evan's award and soon he would be here... As I said, rush, a rush that I don't want to participate anymore...

He arrives, I hear his voice, I already feel his presence in the room, my heart races, when I turn around, I face him, he also sees me and we spend hours looking at each other before he goes to get ready, or maybe seconds, that seemed hours.

"Very well Jô, we're done here, you can rest assured that now we're going to catch the big guy here. Soon we will do the interviews. The production will bring to you some food, make yourself comfortable. Hero, are you ready?"

"Yes."

I turn toward the other room, with the food, when...

"Wait... One minute, I just need to talk to Jô, real quick... Okay?"

I feel Hero pulling me into the room with the clothes and all the makeup. He closed the door.

"Jô, I..."

"Hero, no..."

He comes closer, puts his hands on my face, the feeling comes back, all over again, my heart almost bursting out of my mouth, our faces touching, his heat, my heat, his breath on mine.

"I love you, Jô! I'm sorry for what I said to you... I was jealous... We'll get through this! We always do... I can't feel what I feel with you with anyone else."

"Hero, I love you, and I'm also dying of jealousy of you with these girls... I try to be with someone else... But I don't feel that way with anyone else!"

I look into his eyes, his nearly watering.

"I want to live this, but our lives don't allow us! I don't know if a guy from London and a girl from Australia find each other in this life and try to live a romance it will work!"

"That's right! How did we get into this?!"

We smiled.

"Hero, I'm going to stop all this..."

"This what?" He pulls away to get a better look at me.

"I want to enjoy this life! It's the only one I have!"

"But Jô, don't you enjoy it?"

"I want to be able to do this..." I grab his face and pull him to me, I feel his lip, we kiss softly. "I don't want to hide anymore, hide my feelings, I want to be able to go out with you, travel..."

"We can do this!"

"No, we can't, because we have a public life, if we go out together it will appear on all Instagram accounts, news, magazines, everywhere there will be my face on the screen..."

"Are you saying that..."

"That is better if..."

Knocking on the door, the production calls us, I don't know if it was a sign, but I was certainly happy, for the first time, they interrupting a moment of ours.

"Hero, Jô! Is everything okay there?"

"Go, Hero, we'll talk later."

I go towards the door to unlock it but I feel his arm pulling me. Hero begins to speak, in an almost whispering tone of voice.

"You can even distance me from you, but I will try to stay with you until the last second, because I know you love me as I love you, I don't want fame to ruin what we have, I want to live with you and I will try everything what I can."

Hero said this very close to my mouth, looked into his eyes and the tears he held back rolled down his face. I dry them.

"I love you, and I love you even more for trying this."

Knocks on the door.

"Jô, Hero? Let's go!"

We kiss, a lot, in a hurry, with love, I pull him even closer to me, and he holds me so tightly that it looks like we are going to enter each other. We didn't want to let go, it was the strongest kiss we gave, with the deepest feeling, we knew we were going to try. Like every other time we've done this.