𝐓. 𝐎𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐖𝐀 ⤑ 𝗆𝗒 𝖻𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽'𝗌 𝖻𝖾𝗌𝗍 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽.

six.

chapter six: how to act

for the past hour, i've been sitting in iwa-chan's living room—aka horiguchi's bedroom—with him and horiguchi. we've been sitting on the floor watching an american movie to prepare himself for america next year. iwa-chan sits in between horiguchi and i, and i've been avoiding looking to my right.

i physically cannot look at her without getting worked up over nothing.

"i'm going to use the bathroom, i'll be right back," iwa-chan says. he gets up and disappears into the hallway, leaving horiguchi and i alone.

unlike before, the silence bothers me. as desperate as i want it to be interrupted by one of us asking how the other's day was, it's difficult for me to even breathe around her now. i clear out my throat, hoping it helps me to talk at least.

"how was your day, oikawa?" horiguchi asks me. i turn to her, smiling naturally yet nervously. an odd combination of emotions, really.

"uh it was great! how was yours?" i ask, a little too excitedly.

she laughs softly. her laughter sounds so clear and satisfying, like iced cold water during a hot summer day. as i look at her, i start to take quick mental notes of this moment. her hair's in one long braid, she's wearing a black t-shirt and gray sweatpants. now that i realized, she's never been once to be dressy - not in the eight, maybe nine, years i've known her.

"it was good," she says, sounding out the 'o'.

"so what'd you do today?" i ask her, leaning on the palms of my hands. she looks up at the ceiling in thought.

"well, i'm going to be studying at the university my dad teaches in south korea next year," she says with a huge smile. no wonder why she's in a good mood.

"korea?" i say shockingly. "what— what would you be studying there?"

"i'm planning on studying medicine. i'll open a practice back here in japan," horiguchi says confidently to me, as if it will definitely happen. her confidence eases me, because i know she'll make it happen one day.

"did you always want to be a doctor?" i ask her. now that i realize it, i don't know anything about her hopes and dreams.

"my mom's a nurse, and when i was little my dad, sister and i would surprise her at the hospital she worked at. while we waited i'd see these doctors talk to their patients families, and they always seemed so grateful for them. and if the families were sad, they'd still thank the doctors for doing everything they can. the idea of using my knowledge and capabilities for others always had a strong appeal to me. so, for me to be a doctor, it makes sense," horiguchi tells me.

"wow, i didn't know that about you," i tell her. she tilts her head in confusion, silently asking me to specify what i didn't know. "well that your moms a nurse and why you wanna be a doctor," i say.

horiguchi nods in silence with a straight smile on her face. "yeah, not a lot of people know that. also i heard that karasuno won the qualifiers. im sorry about aoba johsai in the semi finals."

my smile immediately turns rotten, the pain from losing strikes my heart in an instant. i turn away, looking at the window to my left. "yeah, it's fine. congrats on niiyama winning the finals," i mumble.

horiguchi laughs. "oh c'mon oikawa, i didn't mean it like that," she says. i feel her hand touch my right shoulder, attempting to turn me to face her. she shakes my shoulder a bit while calling out to me.

the second i turn to her, we're face to face.

"uh," iwa-chan says in the doorway, causing both of us to fall backwards and away from each other. he looks genuinely disgusted. "what the hell did i just walk in on?"