Untitled Goose Fic

It's a lovely night in Freddy Fazbear's Mega Pizza-Plex, and you are a horrible goose.

It couldn't be said how a whole entire goose found their way into one of the most secure buildings in the city, one fateful night. Genuinely, the day following had the employees scratching their noggins cluelessly as they poured over security footage trying to figure it out.

Regardless, there you were, a glorious grey feathered goose, standing proud on two little orange flipper feet by the main entrance, locked and heavy shutter doors behind you and neon-lit grand halls before you. It didn't matter how you'd gotten in, because when a goose wants something, by golly there isn't a force on this earth or beyond that can stop them.

And what you wanted was, of course, to cause as much mischief as physically possible in the next six hours before the building opened once more.

The trash cans were a perfect place to start. They were nearly twice as tall as you, and cutely decorated with fun colors. The empty cans were no match for you, toppling with minimal effort beneath your mighty will. Letting out a triumphant honk, and now with a taste for success and eager for more, you turned your long neck and swiveled your sights for the next target of your shenanigans.

Movement caught your eye beyond the empty ticket lines. You waddled over to the gates and peeked underneath one. A pair of robotic guards wheeled themselves in synchronization around a fountain, protecting the way past shuttered shops and up to the next floor. These bots, you noticed, were wearing fancy hats.

You would look so dashing wearing one of those hats...

Now with a new objective acquired, you squeezed under the gate and waddled around the perimeter of the two bot's paths, your flipper feet slapping against the tile floor. You waited for an opening, then dashed across the floor towards the fountain. You flapped your majestic wings as you neared, and with a hop, you landed on the wide rim of the fountain.

You paused upon realizing just how shiny the water was. Ah, but this was a trick you'd fallen for before- it wasn't the water that was shiny, it was the coins scattered below the surface. Those might be useful later, but for now, you already had a mission to complete.

The robots were wheeling their way back around, so you quickly hopped into the water and ducked to hide yourself from view, peeking just barely over the ledge. You waited for one of the bots to get close enough, and then let out a quiet honk.

The bot stopped and turned towards the noise, but you'd already ducked back down. You heard the quiet whir of a motor as the bot rolled closer to investigate. You waited patiently until the bot peeked over the rim of the fountain.

With a big splash and several flaps of your wings, you launched yourself up out of the water at the bot. You straightened your neck and snapped your beak shut over the bill of the hat as you crashed into the bot, sending you both toppling backwards.

The bot seemed to be water proof, but with the amount of water you'd splashed onto the floor, the bot's wheels had a hard time keeping their traction, and the bot was unable to keep from slipping and tipping backwards, crashing onto their back. They fumbled with their funky hands, trying to grab you, but you were already using the robot's head as a launching point to propel yourself away from the situation.

You landed smoothly a few feet away, leaving the flailing robot behind. The other bot was after you now though, having seen the commotion. With your prize gripped tight in your beak, you waddled for the stairs as fast as your little legs would carry you.

You hopped your way nearly halfway up the staircase before you realized you were no longer being pursued; it seemed the bots with their wheels could not navigate the steps. Success!