Lost Memories

Chapter I

As the sun rose in the east that morning, its bright rays peaked through the slight silts in my portion of the hut, I rubbed my tired eyes. I couldn't recall the last time I slept peacefully through the night. Days? Weeks? Months even? These sleepless nights have merged into each other, one after the other. I wasn't sure how much longer I could collect myself each new day without proper rest, but there wasn't anything to be done, or so I thought.

Like every other morning, I shook as I removed my layers of sleeping clothes and hurried to wash with the chilly water of the small basin in the room's corner. A cracked mirror hung above the basin, and I would look at my reflection in it. All I could focus on were my eyes, which appeared sunken, dark bags lingering under them. After so long with such eyes, they didn't bother me anymore.

"Katara?" Sokka whispered from the other side of the curtain that divided the rooms in our hut. "Are you awake yet?" I quickly dressed, layering my clothes to keep warm. My brother knew better than to pull back the curtain to my room, even if I didn't answer.

As soon as I was dressed, I slid the curtain to the side, and managed a small smile for my brother. "Good morning," I greeted.

Sokka knew it was never a good morning for me, and that was one reason I loved my older brother so much. He knew things - we didn't have to discuss them, and he understood without question, something that I appreciated more than he would ever know.

"Gran-Gran was asking about you," he spoke wearily. "You should go visit her today." I did my best to ignore his words, but I knew he was right. Our grandmother seemed to always know when to 'ask' about me.

"I'll go see her sometime today," I hesitantly replied. "Catch anything good?" My brothers' lips formed a smile that stretched ear to ear. "Well, I won't have to get my ass up before the crack of dawn for at least the next week." We chuckled together and attended to our morning chores in a comforting silence.

~

As I said I would, I visited my grandmother later that day. By the time I had finished my chores, been to the market, and prepped meals for that day, the sun had told me it was already mid-afternoon. Being midday, my grandmother would be in her healing hut, most likely working with the elderly of our tribe.

I made my way to the healing hut, greeting the all too familiar faces of my neighbors going about their day. The children of the tribe were scattered across the snow-patted ground, playing with one another, the watchful eyes of their mothers nearby. Such a sight was something that made me smile to myself. The children would recall these days as adults when they were carefree, unaware of the responsibilities and burdens of growing up. How I longed to recall such a time as this . . .

When I arrived at the healing hut, the flap was open, so my grandmother wasn't tending to anyone at the moment. As I ducked through the entry and into the large space, the elderly woman didn't notice my presence. She seemed quite focused on something.

"Gran-Gran?" I spoke, hoping to not startle her. "I brought you some berries. I traded a frock I made for them." My grandmother smiled warmly and waved me to sit beside her. We spoke of simple things and shared the berries I brought, exchanging conversation. It wasn't long before I tried to leave, my eyes closing without my consent.

"I should get back now, Gran-Gran," I pushed myself up from the furs. "There are things I need to do before dark." My grandmother grabbed my hand quicker than I could realize. She held it in her cold, fragile one. "I'm not blind, granddaughter," her eyes darted across my face. "You have tired eyes, a pale face, and the furrowing brows of your father. Tell me what the matter is, Katara?"

My grandmother was aware of my restless nights. We had spoken about it before, but this time was different. There was something in her faded blue eyes, and it was more than concern. It was something else that I couldn't distinguish at that moment.