Today, I feel truly and completely free.
All my life, I've been told how things should be done and I followed them willingly. After a while, despite my good intentions, I never seemed to reach the standard. Every action resulted in frustration from the lack of, and I immediately honed in on my faults instead of noticing things I did well.
It was and still is a vicious cycle.
Insecurities eat away the inside and to out-scream their voices in your mind, you rebel. Outwardly. And when you're told you're too defiant, victimization becomes a security fallback.
It's really frustrating, being a people pleaser that doesn't want to please people.
I think that's why I like cursing. Not many people like it, some look down on it. For me, being unashamed of using it is liberation, as twisted as that logic may seem. And when I use it and someone disapproves, I smile inside cause those voices are silenced and I am in control.
Now I don't need to do something wrong to experience my freedom. I am blessed that I have a God who Loves me and Cares about me. My prayer is that I will continue to find my secureness in him.
Being His Child makes me-
Truly and completely free.
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I should take my own advice (Things I say but it's only in my head)
Poetry(Things I say but it's only in my head - nuggets of wisdom from a chaotic teenage mind, trying to make a place in this world while staying true to myself and my values. Includes sarcastic commentary, and exasperated sayings as well as bursts of an...