The half of me / Duskwood

Chapter 23

The sound of Jake's keys had been better than listening to any soothing music to sleep.

When I wake up, I see that I don't have my phone next to me. I quickly get out of bed, walking down the stairs.
I walk into the kitchen and see my mother with the coffee in her hand.
    "Good morning, honey" she tells me, picking up my phone from the counter ". I went into your room to see how you were doing and it wouldn't stop ringing, so I took it with me so you could rest better."
    "Mom..." I snort and reach over to pick it up.
    "I'm sorry daughter, but after what happened you need to rest" she brushes my hair away with a smile ". I have spoken to Lilly, I hope you don't mind, they are all worried about you."
     I nod reading the messages. Everyone asks if I'm okay after the arrest.
    "What if you go to Duskwood until they arrest Daliah's murderer?" I look at my mother surprised "Honey, you're going through terrible things, I think it would be good for you to leave until things calm down a bit."
     Duskwood is further away from Evergreed, if I leave now, I'd be away from Jake and we're investigating together.
    "I can't." she answered with a weak voice. I need to stay.
    "Does a boy have to do with it?" She arches an eyebrow with a smile.
     I can't help it and I blush. I finally nod and she laughs, hugging me.
    "I'm glad you found someone special" she whispers to me ". I hope he's taking good care of you.
    "Yeah, he cares a lot about me and you guys" I admit, so she knows Jake is thinking of them ". He really helps me deal with the situation."
    "Why don't you invite him to have dinner with us this week?" She gives me a tap on my shoulder, with a mischievous smile "I have to take a good look at him to give my approval."
   <<I wish he could come.>>
     I laugh and I give her a kiss on the cheek.
    "I'm going to shower-"
    "Shall I make you breakfast?" I look at her as if I were saying no "I haven't made breakfast for my daughter in years."
    "Okay." I sigh with a slack laugh, and I left the kitchen.
     At least, I'm glad to see that we finally talk like before. I think that this way we will get along better to support each other.

After a hot shower, I decide to write to the group saying that when I leave my parents' house, I would talk to them.

I go down the stairs and there is a knock on the door. When I look through the peephole, I see Elliot. I take a breath trying to calm down.
I open it and his look is almost pleading. Without needing to say a word yet, he apologizes with his eyes.
    "Can we talk?" He asks me, drawling his words.
    "I don't think that-"
    "It's important." he says firmly.
     I inhale and nod.

I'm too good to him despite what happened. I always keep giving him chances.

I excuse myself to my mom and go out with Elliot.

At first no one says anything despite everything there is to say to us. We only walk, listening to the laughter of the children preparing to go to school with their parents.
I see some girls who are twins and I smile when I see how they talk animatedly to each other. I miss being able to tell Daliah all my secrets like before, sharing with her that I've seen Jake and we're together, watching her get a little upset and then accepting it even though she doesn't like it.
I need my best friend...
    "Do you remember when we met?" He asks me and I look at hi, "You had your hair up with some blue clips with small flowers."
    "Do you remember what I was wearing that day?" I look at him strangely.
    "I like to remember the important things in my life" he says with a smile on him lips. I look away embarrassed ". It made your eyes stand out." I swallow nervously. Trying to stay calm ". Dare I say, I was going to the store just to see you."
    "That's... a little scary."
    "I wanted to know which of the pieces of furniture you could spend the most time with me showing me and talking about."
     In other words, his strategy was to keep me occupied with the rest of the clients. Have me to himself.
I don't know what to think of that right now.
    "But Daliah came." I reply, to keep his mind on Earth.
    "Yes" he sighs between his teeth ", just at the most inopportune moment."
     I remember that day. I was laughing at a comment Elliot had made, but I don't remember now what it was, although it was the first time a guy had made me laugh like that. In part, I think I liked him.
Daliah then appeared walking towards us. We were going to go to lunch together that day and she fell for him and started being flirtatious.
I walked away to continue working, I imagined that in the end it was going to happen, that she was going to be interested in Daliah.
And right the next day, she told me that she was going on a date with Elliot Bloomgate. The most attractive policeman in town. She was excited and with a smile that no one could erase. I was happy for her.
    "What does that have to do with it now?" I ask, stopping my pace, trying to figure out why he's telling me about our first meeting.
     Elliot stands in front of me. Head down. I would like to try to get into his brain to find out what is happening right now, why all this, kindness, is he still guilty of arresting me? He could have helped me with his superiors.
    "I wanted to talk to you about that weird guy-"
    "He is not weird, Elliot" I defend Jake, crossing my arms ". He only wanted to help me."
    "And how is it that he knows about Armando Serrano?" He stares at me and I look away. He lets out a slack laugh ". That's why you got in touch with that guy again, you're investigating your sister's murder."
     I bite the inside of my cheek. I mustn't tell him that we're looking into a murdered person's computer. It would be yet another reason to arrest me for obstructing the police and their investigation.
    "Was he the one you smiled for the other time?" I'm surprised by the question, I thought we were going to talk about the investigation "MC, you shouldn't be with someone like him."
    "If you knew him better, you'd surely see that he's a good person" I reply weakly, guarding my words ". And it's not like we see each other either, we just talk again on the phone..."
    "He is not a good person" I look into his eyes and he sighs ". Listen, he threatened me, has he told you?"
     I shake my head. Did he threaten him? Jake?
He threatened to make me look like Daliah's killer and to hack into police files and destroy everything." His tone is one of real anger. I shake my head ". MC, that guy doesn't care about the work we're doing to find out who murdered your sister."
    "No, that's not true-"
    "He doesn't care about anyone except himself, you shouldn't continue with someone like that, who knows what trouble he can get you back?"
    "He really cares about me, he helped me" I say, fixing my eyes on his ". Elliot, he would never be able to hurt me or anyone else."
    "Your expression gives you away" he says, shaking his head. " He has done it right? He almost hurt someone."
    "But not because he wants to-"
     With him you will only have more and more problems. How many people do you think he will be able to do the same to?" I look away, "Tell me, how many people are he going to keep threatening?"
I take a deep breath. I don't know what to say. Yes, it is true that he almost hurt Mike, but I don't think he does it because he is violent... right?
But threatening Elliot... why did you do that, Jake?
    "MC" he places his hands on my cheeks and caresses them ", you don't know how sorry I am that day for accepting that date with Daliah, I should have asked you first and not have chickened out for not doing it."
     I stay silent, my heart beating fast. I didn't think he would tell me this after so many years.
    "Why did you break up?" I ask, wanting to get that question out of my head "Was it because of me?"
     Elliot meets my eyes and shakes his head.
    "No, there was one other thing" His hand brushes my hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear ". It was... Ha... It was talking about the future with my mother" he says wistfully ". We were talking about starting a family and Daliah said that she didn't want children."
    "Just for that?"
    "Maybe she never told you, but she was still afraid after years of the kidnapping" his voice tries to calm me down with her explanation ", she didn't want the same thing to happen to her son. We argued about it, but she wouldn't come to her senses. Her fear was stronger."
     And she was still young" I tell him a little annoyed ". I think that conversation should have waited."
    "It was never going to happen. In the end, Daliah was a free soul, she wasn't into compromise" he moves away from me and walks slowly again and I follow him ". She told me herself, that she didn't see me in the future, that she didn't want to see herself in Rosenschwarz with three children and her preparing breakfast for them every morning" he says with a laugh. I guess remembering that moment ". So I preferred that we broke up."
     I nod slowly. I don't understand why Daliah didn't tell me about this, I can understand that maybe it wasn't something that special, but I could understand her. I know what you went through.
    "Then there was you" I look at Elliot, who looks at me at the same time ", I loved Daliah, but I couldn't stop thinking about you" I look down, uncomfortable ". It hurts me to admit that maybe I should have said your name while we were in bed."
    "I don't want to hear this." I say, turning around.
     Elliot stops me, holding my hand.
I want to look into his eyes, but he makes me uncomfortable. He has told me as if it were something normal. I don't want to know if he really said my name when he was with Daliah, I would feel guilty that I broke off their relationship despite not having done anything.
    "Forgive me" he says slowly ". I don't want you to have the wrong vision of me now" he caresses my hand slowly, coming back to me ". MC, I love you" my eyes stop at his gaze, observing him well. I think he meant it ". Don't waste your life with someone you know can never make you happy, he will always put you in danger."
I look down, perfectly understanding his words.
I dare not answer him, I know he is right. It is dangerous. It always will be.
Incredible... It's making me doubt.
I shake my head, slowly letting go of his grasp. Although it's not like he's holding me tight, he just holds me very carefully, as if he were going to break me.
    "Do you think I don't know?" I tell him, swallowing "Daliah also told me, warned me about it."
    "You should have listened to her better."
     I nod slowly.
    "Yes, I should have."
     There is silence between the two and I breathe heavily.
Elliot runs his fingers over my face and I look at him, confused.
    "Be careful with him, please" he whispers against my lips and I get nervous, remembering his kiss ", I don't want to lose you."
     I don't say anything, I just stay tuned to see if he's going to kiss me or not.
But finally, he breaks away, walking away.
I begin by breathing rapidly, desperately gasping for air. My head is spinning after all this conversation. I didn't think I was actually going to be this nervous around him.