𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘚𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘴|𝙵𝚛𝚒𝚍𝚊𝚢 𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝙵𝚞𝚗𝚔𝚒𝚗'

Road Rage

"Ok. What the fuck am I looking at?" asked Ruv, squinting at the sight before him.
"Tada!" Boyfriend said. "You're looking at the brand new, one of a kind fun bus!"
"It looks like you took one of Daddy Dearest's tour busses and wrote "Fun" over his face." said Pico.
"Yeah, that's exactly what I did." said Boyfriend. "It's totally cool. Girlfriend said we could borrow it!"
"Borrow it for what exactly?" asked Aldryx.
"A road trip!" Boyfriend said. "And you're all going! Surprise!"
"Nope." said Ruv. He turned to leave.
"It might be fun." said Whitty, catching Ruv by his jacket before he could get too far.
"Don't tell me you're going along with this lunacy." Ruv groaned.
"If Whitty's in, then I'm in!" Agoti said. "And that means you two are too." he said to Aldryx and Tabi.
"We're taking Ruv prisoner so he's in too." said Whitty. Ruv looked at them with a mixed expression of anger and despair.
"This sounds so fun!" Hex said, clapping his clamps together. "I've never been on a road trip before!"
"I don't know if this is such a good idea." Tabi said slowly.
"Are we seriously agreeing to go on a spontaneous road trip?" Pico asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Pretty much." said Boyfriend. "Everyone's going, you're legally required to."
"I really don't think this is a good idea." Tabi said, more frantically this time. His voice was loud enough for only Agoti and Aldryx to hear.
"Technically we'd be getting away from the bitch that shall not be named. It might be good for you." Agoti said.
"With him?" Tabi asked, glancing at Boyfriend. "I still want to punch his smug little face in."
"It's gonna be ok, we'll be right there with you." Aldryx promised.
"Question, how long are we going to be gone for?" Pico asked.
"No idea. I didn't plan anything. That's part of the fun!" Boyfriend said.
"So you're telling me I'm being dragged on a road trip with no discenrable destination that could last years for all we know?" asked Ruv.
"Pretty much." Boyfriend said.
"I hate my life." said Ruv.
"Then a vacation might be good for you!" Hex said. "I think that this will be a lovely group bonding experience. I'll bring license plate bingo!"
"So I'm thinking maybe half an hour to pack, then we're on our way." Boyfriend said.
"Are we seriously doing this?!" Tabi protested.
"It's not like anyone else has anything to do." Boyfriend said.
"What about my little buddy? Where's him and Pump?" asked Whitty.
"Well, they have school, so I figured that they couldn't come." said Boyfriend. "That means we can do adult things!"
"We do adult things while they're there all the time." Agoti said.
"Please phrase that differently." Whitty groaned.
"So, half an hour, sound good?"
"I guess." Tabi said, still looking worried. Agoti patted his shoulder.
"Someone go with Ruv so we can make sure he actually comes back." said Boyfriend.
"God dammit." said Ruv.

"You're going!" Sarvente said sweetly. Hex had accompanied Ruv back to the church after packing his own things.
"No I'm not."
"Yes you are." Hex and Sarvente said together.
"Here, I already packed for you. Hex called me as soon as you made plans so we could make sure that you didn't get a chance to escape." Sarvente said, handing him a travel bag.
"The entire universe is conspiring against me." Ruv said.
"You're going to have fun, I can feel it!" Sarvente said. "You're going to have so much fun, it'll kill you!"
"That's what I'm worried about." said Ruv.

"How many pairs of socks should I pack?" asked Whitty.
"You can never have too many socks. Pack them all." said Hex.
"I literally could not care less." Ruv said grumpily.
"What are you guys doing?" Carol asked, poking her head into Whitty's room.
"Packing for a road trip!" said Hex. "It's very exciting." He and Ruv had decided to meet up with Whitty after getting Ruv's things.
"Exciting huh?" Carol said, taking in Ruv's depressed expression.
"Very." said Hex.
"How many bags of chips do I bring?" asked Whitty.
"I think you should pack more important things." Carol said, peeking into his bag which only contained a large amount of snacks. "Like clothes."
"Shit!" Whitty said, hiding his face so Carol couldn't see it burning. "I didn't plan that or anything! It's not like we're going to a nudists' colony or anything."
"I wouldn't be surprised if we did." Ruv said gloomily.