With Love from the Heights

Ten

Toby had only been gone a week and yet, Ashley missed him. She wasn't one of these girls that was overly clingy, but her mental health hadn't been the best and she just wished that she wasn't so alone.

Sat on the beach, Ashley snapped a picture of her hand and sent it to Toby with a message that read Feels empty without yours to hold. With a sigh, she wrapped her arms around her knees and brought them to her chest as she watched the sunset.

It was early when she woke up the next morning, smiling at the picture Toby had sent in response of his hand and reading the text that followed. It'll soon be back where it belongs. Unsure what to do with the rest of her day, Ashley scanned through the videos on her Youtube channel and impulsively deleted any video with Mattias in it.

She had been working for a few hours, when her phone chimed again and she opened the new message that she'd received on Instagram. The fact that it was from Mattias should have been enough for her to just ignore it, but the picture was of Toby and her heart sank a little at what it captured.

Toby's smile was big and genuine, the girl's eyes alight with happiness. That alone didn't concern her, but her brain soon pointed out the placement of his hand on her hip and the way she was looking at him... that was what hurt.

Despite being upset, Ashley forwarded the photo to Toby and followed it up with a question mark. His response came quickly and she hesitated, the worst scenarios playing out in her mind.

It's not what it looks like and I know that the photo is bad, but I'm only grinning because the boys were teasing me about us.

What about the girl?

She was drunk and kept trying to get me to dance with her... ask any of the boys.

She didn't want to doubt him and she mentally cursed herself as she opened the chat that she'd been having with Callum, sending him the photo.

I hate myself for doing this, but... who's the girl?

Oh man. That girl was absolutely wrecked last night at the bar, kept trying to flirt with Toby and get him to dance with her. Why do you ask?

Mattias sent me the picture... you know how my head is at the moment.

After a few more message exchanges with Callum, she deleted the photo from her phone and tried to carry on with what she had started. Why am I so broken? Ashley thought as tears filled her eyes Why can't I just be normal?

She ignored her phone over the next few days, afraid of the impact her mistrust may have had on her relationship with Toby, and buried herself in her work. She was in the middle of uploading a video, when someone knocked on the door and she went to answer it; assuming that it was the food she'd ordered.

"Hey," Toby greeted as she opened the door.

"Hi... I thought you were away for a few more days?"

"Callum mentioned that you've not been in the best place mentally lately and we were worried, so I came home early. Can I come in?"

Guilt stirred in Ashley's chest as she nodded, stepping back to allow him to enter and closing the door behind him.

"I'm sorry," Ashley stated after a short silence, avoiding Toby's gaze and continuing, "My inability to function normally wasn't worth you cutting your trip short..."

"It was worth it. You are worth something to people, Ash, not just me, and I hate that you don't see it," Toby said, "I could list the ways that you are a good person, but I won't... that's something that you need to figure out for yourself."

"I'm broken that's what I am," Ashley mumbled, moving to turn away and stopping when Toby's fingers wrapped around her wrist.

"You're not broken, everyone has things that they hate about themselves and yours are just made worse by your mental health," Toby argued gently.

Ashley chewed her lip as Toby's words sank in, glancing up to find him watching her, "Really?"

Toby smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead as he wrapped his arms around her, "Really."