Uh Huh, Honey

Play it in my mind

When the front face of the studio comes into view, an unfamiliar feeling seeps through Giyuu's stomach. He would pass it off as déjà vu, but never before has he pulled up to this building with such apprehension.

Still facing forward, Shinobu takes her hands off the steering wheel and places them in her lap.

"Giyuu." A sugar-coated warning, hidden under her usual placating voice. "Last chance."

Last chance to back out. To pull the plug and save himself from the consequence of today.

Giyuu appreciates her for giving him the option even when it doesn't really exist.

In a perfect world, he'd have the freedom to chicken out right now. In the real world, slumped in her car outside the door of the studio he has to film for in the same afternoon, it's far too late.

He thought about it, though. So much that he dreamt of it—being on set with Sanemi again and the many ways it could go wrong—only to wake in a cold sweat and hard between his legs. But after all his doubts and all his worries, Giyuu never picked up the phone to call Uzui and tell him he couldn't go through with it. So backing out now, when everyone had already taken time out of their day to come here and set up production, would be beyond insulting.

"I can do it."

Shinobu sighs, the sound of it filling the entire car. She's been doing that a lot lately.

Finally she turns her head to look Giyuu in the eye, scanning his face, a tightness in her own that suggests she has something to say. In the end, it remains unsaid.

Kicking open the car door, Shinobu chirps, "Let's go, then," and that's that. Together they walk across the sidewalk and to the entrance of the building Giyuu's been in more times than he can count, Shinobu leading the way as Giyuu trails a step behind.

The lobby is just as spotless as he remembers. A glaring reminder that while he's stuck in limbo, the rest of the world goes on.

"Welcome back, Tomioka-san, Kochou-san." Kanata, their trusty secretary, greets them with a perfect smile. Always cordial, regardless of the situation. Giyuu doesn't know how she does it, but he wants in on her secret. "It's good to see you both again. I'm happy to inform you that we are on schedule for the shoot at three o'clock sharp. There's no rush; take your time to prepare, then head to our main production room. They are all set to begin once you and your partner are ready. Are you okay to find your room on your own?"

Giyuu nods.

"Great. I'll let Uzui-san know you've arrived. Grab me if you need anything."

With another nod from Giyuu, Kanata smiles again and lifts a hand to her mic. Shinobu takes Giyuu by the elbow and steers him into the hallway on their right, all the way down to the private dressing room he's used since they relocated here about a year ago.

There, with Giyuu's hand on the doorknob, Shinobu squeezes his elbow once before letting go.

"I'll go fill out your paperwork now, okay?" She lifts an arm to flash her phone at Giyuu. "Text if anything comes up."

"Yes, Mom," Giyuu says, letting a small smile rise to his lips when Shinobu rolls her eyes and swats at him before taking her leave.

Once she turns the corner, his smile evaporates like a drop of rainwater on sun-scorched pavement. Giyuu faces the door, twists the knob between his fingers, and pushes his way into the room.

Inside, routine takes over. It's like a trigger—seeing these walls he knows almost as well as those of his bedroom empties his mind and sends his limbs moving according to pure muscle memory.