Miasma

Chapter 17

Genesis tried to keep his distance from Sephiroth's conversation with Lucrecia.

Shifting on rough sandstone, the redhead rubbed his shoulder absentmindedly. Staring with unseeing eyes at the back corner of the cavern, the blue-eyed former SOLDIER reflected that it wasn't much of a conversation to begin with, but it was still none of his business. He didn't know Lucretia...not really...not underneath her file; he couldn't make a judgement based on that. Gaia, he wanted to, but he wouldn't...though not for his own sake, for Sephiroth's sake. He'd known Circinae what felt like two seconds before she died, he wasn't going to instill the same ire in his partner because he'd had somewhat shitty parents. Eyeing the woman encased in crystallized mako, the former Commander reflected that he didn't know if Lucrecia was alive. The idealisms of it were disturbing to say the least. Someone with the withwhereal to die inch by inch, covered in raw mako until it created some type of sentient fossil resin of themselves had to be in a hell of a lot of pain beforehand. A part of him squirmed in a kind of reluctantly sympathetic squeamishness at the mere idea.

He wasn't sure what dismissed Lucretia's aims and what made Hojo infallible.

Not in the sense of culpability, but in the logic regarding why Hojo had gotten to go on to become some type of crazed super villain admired for his genius, and why Lucrecia had essentially faded into a tortured shadow and then ended up where they were. What was wrong with her resilience? Why had she chosen flight over fighting for her child? Looking over at the individual next to him...the whispers of what had happened during Sephiroth's childhood...what had happened to him well into adulthood crept in upon him. If Dr. Crescent had been used half as heinously as her son, without enhancements, without Jenova cells to bolster her fortitude...how damaged an individual would that create? How broken was Lucretia by the time her child was born? He didn't really want to think about it, because if he did, he was going to pity her. Pity was an inconvenience in the face of abandonment; it didn't allow for straightforward consideration...didn't allow for judgement. It was easier to think of Lucretia as stupid and neglectful than abused and frightened...

...Easier to place blame on the inane than the incarcerated.

Sephiroth was still quite clearly uncomfortable. He'd changed out of his slacks-though not without insisting Genesis stand in front of him with a blanket and his back facing his mother-but he was pale and the fingers he was currently using to unscrew a water bottle were unsteady; somewhat jerky in their purpose. The hours preheralding such tenuous tranquility-if it could even be called that-had been agonizing...for both of them. Seeing his partner in so much pain...feeling helpless in terms of being able to do anything...Genesis never wanted to go through that again. The reality that he would have to go through it again, inevitably, was terrifying. The former Commander had held onto his sanity by a single thread, and he was loathe to give Lucrecia credit...but she'd walked him through much of it. He supposed he shouldn't be surprised by her expertise...she was a scientist...but she wasn't a gynecologist.

It was some sort of standoff.

Pursing his lips, the redhead let his gaze flick from the former General to the former scientist and back again. Rather, it seemed that Sephiroth was in a standoff with himself and his mother was simply waiting for him to come to some sort of conclusion. They really didn't have time for this, he reflected a bit bitterly. He truly wanted them to, but they needed to find a hospital at this point. At the very least they needed to find shelter and warmth. It seemed like this particular mantra galloped around his head like a herd of wild horses. Because he could want and wish and need but the only thing that was going to get them anywhere was doing. SOLDIERs learned to expect little from inaction; it didn't get you promoted, didn't get you paid and didn't get you recognized. Sometimes he wondered how much that hurt individual mentality; such an ingrained and constant need to drive forward. Regardless, this was something they needed to make time for...for the sake of the individual before him...for the sake of finding some answers.