Dead ya exes don't let em haunt you.

Unexpected.......

Once we started dating it was a little awkward at first, no kisses which I was fine with. He used to hug me so tightly. Now it's just like eh... ok. It used to be amazing though. When we had our first kiss, I had butterflies in my stomach. Whenever he hugged me, I did as well. He was.... different.... from my ex. However, we were really toxic after about a year or so. After that year we were on and off till I was 13 which is now but im about to turn 14, keep in mind we started dating when I was about 11. Whenever me and him broke up we would go to the same two people, I would go to JJ. He would go to Yana who is now my best friend. I started having panic attacks and anxiety attacks in general but when we broke up, they got worse, I stopped going to school. I stopped communicating. The only person who was there for me was my boy best friend, Joshua. When I was crying, he was there. When I was suicidal, he was there. He's always been there like I have for him.

Me and JJ have been ok lately, but something you guys don't know is I talked to Ke at one point.... we kissed. Now I'm not cool with either of them not because their brothers and JJ found out but because of another incident. Keep in mind Ke knows how I feel about JJ he's walked in on us kissing, but JJ doesn't know about me and Ke. Not to mention he messes with my "old" best friend Rah. She doesn't know either.

Right now, I'm "dating" Rell and talking to someone else...named Kell, well his name is Markell. He is 19 I believe. He lives in Alabama he has been to my city before, but we ended up arguing that same week and never got to meet each other in person. However, he planned a visit in August, and he said he brought a promise ring. He might be more serious than Rell because I've been dating Rell for about 4 years and now and hasn't brought me a ring yet. I've only been talking to Kell for about 5 or 6 months.