I built a house with many rooms
no furniture, the walls are gloom.
each one belongs to a person of my past
if I don't put this on paper, it may never pass
keep up, I'ma go through them fast..
the first room ima take u to is where I grew up , pretty normal childhood but my parents split up
as children we learn to make things our fault
that was my first road block.
anxiety grew, everyday
I use to dream of them fighting, living it in replay.
everything I told myself about me never sat straight
my self talk from an early age, was hate.
started looking at myself, differently
I was so hard on myself consistently
second room, is an eating disorder I didn't even understand
but when we walk in you'll experience it firsthand.
I use to distort my own image in the mirror
I couldn't even look at myself in a picture
made me sad when I thought about my figure.
I taught myself to hate who I was
that's not what a little girl does.
third room is where the true problem got hidden
in fact there ain't enough pages for this truth to be written..
only a little girl with trust that was taken
he will never know how fucked up his mistake was
nobody does cause this room will always stay locked
I keep this secret hidden, and sometimes blocked
nobody gets in here, so don't bother to knock.
next we will go upstairs I need to warn you to beware
maybe this will be the beginning of my repair
you will get a glimpse of who I am, well who I was but pls don't judge me like everyone else does
the only reason I'm allowing you to see is because I want to be a better version of me...
SNLpoetry
11/2021
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