The Fall

Chapter 4

Serkan stroked her little arm from behind, letting her know he was awake and bent over to look at her, what he saw absolutely tore his sensitive heart. Kiraz was weeping softly, she sobbed, her whole body shaking with her cries.

He turned her around, embracing her, taking her small body into his arms, Kiraz snuggled against his chest, crying. "Bebeğim yapma...don't cry like this, lütfen." He consoled.

"It's my fault Baba, this is all because of me. I didn't knew she would fall." She hicupped, sobbing.

Serkan shut his eyes and kissed her forehead. "Bak bana Kiraz, this is not your fault tamam ? It was an accident aşkim, it's not because of you. I don't want you to think like that, Anne wouldn't want you to think like that. It's not your fault." Serkan repeated over and over, she blamed herself so much for the accident, he figured it would take the little child some time and repeating over to understand.

"I'll show you something princess.." He took the phone from her and swipped over to the top of the gallery, showing her pictures of newborn Alp.

Serkan hadn't shown them to anyone, Kiraz was the only one to see their son, even before Eda. Kiraz took a hold of the phone.

"That's the baby ?" She asked in awe.

"Evet, that's your little brother, Alp." Serkan said, allowing a smile to grace his lips despite everything, it was the first time he was sharing the joy of welcoming their second child in the world, and if it wasn't with Eda, there was no one else he'd rather share this moment with than their daughter.

"He is so small Baba, why is he tied to that tube ?" Kiraz asked, and Serkan was glad that even for a second, curiosity replaced utter distress on her little face.

"Alp is very sick, he was premature. That means he is born too early. I'd have taken you to see him, and hold him, but he needs to rest." Serkan stroked her hair as he explained.

"He wasn't supposed to be born now ?" Kiraz said and paused for a while, then realisation hit her and her face fell. "It's because Anne fell.." She said to no one in particular and tears poured down her cheeks again.

She realised her mistake hadn't only hurt her mother but also an innocent soul like her baby brother. Anne and Baba seemed to love this new baby so much, what if something happened to it and they blamed her ? Hated her for it.

"I am so sorry Baba." She cried again, hiding her face in his chest out of shame.

"Kiraz, what did I say, it's not your fault bebe...lütfen guzelim, my most precious girl, don't think like that, don't cry." He conforted.

"Anne nerede ?" She asked, and Serkan's chest constricted at the dreaded question.

"Anne's in the Hospital kizim." He said truthfully, not knowing what to reply.

"Is she okay Baba ?" Kiraz asked with hopeful eyes. Serkan looked at her tiny chocolate pools, the same Eda had.

It would be so convenient to lie, hadn't Eda used a lie too, with him being an astronaut, to protect their daughter from heartbreak ? But something in him demanded honesty. He owed at least the truth to his daughter.

"She's very hurt Kiraz, she is alseep." He could only say, his voice laced with pain.

"Is Anne dying ?" Kiraz asked and Serkan felt like he was punched in the stomach. "I don't know bebe, I don't know. You got to hope okay ? Send her all your love and strenght, you're her fairy, do you know that ?" Serkan stroke her back.

"I don't know how to bring her back." Kiraz said in a small sad voice.

Serkan wanted to complain like she did, like a child. Because he didn't knew what to do either, he didn't even knew how he was still functionning.