Why not return?

Sometime I look back on our fond memories.
The days I was told to stop being a cry baby.

I would smile. I'm smiling.

The days I would get beat up and they'd have my back. Brothers, I love calling them that.

It's their calling in my life, they can't leave me now.
So I thought.

I remember he left. I wish he stayed around. Longer.
With us.

" It was Sabo on that boat. "
The words seem like a faint memory.

It rings in my ear every time I wake from a nightmare.

Sabo was one of my older brothers, he called me down from our treehouse early in the morning.
The treehouse we built together and called home.

It probably has moss and all kinds of cool bugs scattered along the boards by now.
I love thinking about my past memories with him.

It feels like his presence is still around me.
Yet, it's not. He's been gone for years. Ace always reminded me that he was gone.

Now I feel pain from our memories.

I would be told to help hunt for dinner.
I love meat, it's my favorite. I think they know it best.

Personally, I think they know I like beetles best as bugs, meat as food, and them as my brothers.

I smile fondly.

I would be reminded by footsteps of the ones outside of the treehouse taunting me, the ones waiting on me.

" Lu! Come down! " I wouldn't wait another minute. I know I was always there in a second.

Either flying out of the door or falling from the railing. Either way, I'd get down in a second.
Whenever I fell they would catch me, and I would laugh.

" Shishishi, you didn't have to catch me, I'm rubber I would bounce off my back! "
I remember their, Ace's red face. Sabo's stuttering, it sounds like a broken record.

Ace always breaks the record, I would dance to that record.

We'd argue and fight. Sabo would stop us, he always hug me away from Ace.

I wondered why for a very short while.
Our time together was cut short.

While that's true, he did tell me Ace was always too much of a pushover to be coddled like me.

Then again, he'd come into our hug.
He's always allowed to be with us.

I hated when he complained about his Father. He didn't know him, and he let others talk and talk and it made him hate.

I don't like hate.

I love.
Love is easy. I love meat, beetles and bugs, the sun, Shanks, and most of all, my brothers.

I can see why Sabo could hate his family.
I see why I hate them.

I hate them, I like hating them.

It helps me forgive the fact he's gone and I can't blame anything other than them.
I like to blame them.

I still blame myself sometimes though, I hate that.
I don't hate myself, I'm just hardest on myself.

" See you, Luffy! "
Ace hollered from his boat to me that day.

The day he was also in a boat.
Like him.

The day he sailed.
Like him.

The day he left me behind.
Like him.