F1 one shots - driverxdriver

Gone - Yuki x Pierre

Warnings:
☆ Death (not detailed)
☆ Suicide (not detailed)

"Hi Pear" Yuki smiles through tears. He straightens up, but a sigh make his shoulders heavy again. A peaceful silence has fallen over the nature around him.

He crouches down on the muddy ground and sighs once again. Tears are still streaming down on his puffy cheeks and there's nothing he can do to stop them.

Yuki tries to remember what his best friend used to tell him when sadness took over him, but when the person he was inseparable with is gone, there's something inside of him trying to say that nothing matters anymore. When you loose someone that brings you the joy and happiness you need, it's difficult to find that spark again.

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath to stop himself from breaking down. There are birds whistling over him in the early hour of this day.

A quiet laugh escapes his lips when he starts reminiscing about the good memories they have together. Regardless of what the situation was, they were always free to be themselves; if it was karaoke, football trick competition or as simply as a movie night.

A piece of Yuki has been missing ever since the day he learned that Pierre wouldn't make it. Everyone has noticed it, and even he realizes it when he gets a glimpse of himself in the mirror. Where there used to be a smile, there is now something that cannot be further away from just that.

Yuki tries to get rid of all the thoughts which accumulates in his head, and tries to calm down.

He blinks a few times and wipes away his own tears with the material of Pierre's sweater, the one Yuki would steal from him all the time. They would always joke about how big it was on him, but the big size gave him a type of comfort. A sort of comfort he just can't put his words on.

He believes he should start working on the task he had come here to complete seeing that his sleeves have become too wet to be able to dry his eyes any further.

His hands make their way to the oversized flower boquete on his right side. A rustling sound from the wrapping paper break the silence right before Yuki starts speaking.

"I brought your favorite flowers" His voice sounds broken yet it's able to get the words out.
There's a stick snapping further away from him, but his eyes seem to stay glued on the stone in front of him.

Yuki gently places the flowers all over the grave while he tries to hold back the hot tears from his eyes.

"I just don't get why you had to leave..." He takes his time to place the flowers around and holds back a sob. "You were too young a-and had a long life ahead of you" He trails off while looking down on one of the flowers.

He keeps looking at that one marine blue flower as all their memories keep coming back to him. He reminisces back to the moment and remembers it like it just happened: Yuki had shared the podium with Pierre in his first-ever Formula One season.
Later that night, Pierre had visited him in his hotel room carrying a huge bouquet of flowers, their favorite snacks, and of course he wore the smile that Yuki adores so much.
Perhaps it may not be a common thing to give your boy best friend a huge flower bouquet, but looking back, Yuki wouldn't have changed a thing about the evening.

His thoughts are interrupted by a disturbing yet comforting thought; that Pierre is still here with him. He is still here, laying a few feet under him.

The thought makes Yuki break down again as he reflects over the thought that they will never be able to see, hear or talk to each other ever again.
His best friend is gone and there's nothing he can do about it.

In between sobs and heavy breathes, Yuki tries to speak out the words he's been saying countless times the past few months. He stumble over the words, but he couldn't care less.

"I miss- I miss you," he pauses to catch his breath. "so so so much Pear" He tries to stabilize his breath, but his throat feels so tight. It almost feels like he's being choked.

"I can't keep doing this" He looks up to the grave again. "I can't live without you Pierre" His head starts spinning and the words he lets out sound like gibberish.

His mind turns black and every part of his body is immovable.

Maybe, just maybe, him dying wouldn't be as bad as everyone makes it out to be.

His last flashback that goes through his mind explains why everything seems to blurr around him. He remembers the empty box of pills on the counter.