(this isnt a rose fanfic.) A rose with a thousand thorns.

Where's your head gone?

Tears overwhelm my eyes and they crumble. The once strong pride falters.
I can feel the desperation, their nails the like needles as they dug into flesh.
Filling my nerves with a overwhelming
hopelessness.
Seeping into my shadow until it towers over me. Then, they look up at me. And, at their
weakest state.

They smile.
Oh god...
That smile.
The one that lights up a room.
Soon, i stumble.
The light flickering. I desperately try to hold on. Pulling, tugging.
Until i fall.
Sobbing like a young child losing their mother. the looming presence of my shadow comes infront of me. Suddenly, as if never there. they're gone.
The noir void remains. Cold, a cold embrace.
What was i crying about?...
Where am i...
Wh- why am i here?
When.. when did i get here?
*how* did i get here.
Who am i..
I see my hands again. Grey. I can't i cant ever see my beloved ones. i can only see the shadow of what once was *me*.
Was i ever *me*?
What did it mean.. to be *me*.
I...
Just want to be home once more.

I look in the mirror, the one that took their place. My eyes. No, they're not mine.

Im not you.
Im- im not you.
I mumble to the mirror.
To my dismay, their reflection only denies my protest.
I am me

They are me.
I am not me.
I lost me, a long time ago.
She's lost, hurt, and scared.

She's split up forced to wander a remnant of who *i* was.
Theres no undo on this one.
No savepoint to restart this round.
Your decisions have consequences.
Your shadow, your karma, your sins.
Theyre right behind you.

You may evade them, but do they?
You know who they are.
That one light in your life.
The one thing that keeps the shadow behind you, and not let it surround you; suffocate you.
You're selfish.
All humans are, thats nature.
Face your shadow.
Embrace the pain you have inflicted.

What comes around goes around.
Round and round its pushing the world to go round.

Here i am, down. Down on the floor. The cold tile floor. Screaming and sobbing for redemption. For one chance at home again.
But i am not guilty. You are.
You are my house fire.
You have spread to my forests
And i have no extinguisher.
Fueling the fire of my shadow.
I am prisoner.
You are so low you must drag one thing with you.

But, I'll let you.
Because if im the one to fall.
Then my light will shine.
And will watch, like the stars above.
Their beauty unmatched.
I will always light another, because if im anything.
Im not you.