One Ring to troll them all

The Last Homely House

Have you ever felt the urge for the earth to swallow you whole in order to escape an awkward, terrifying conversation that you didn't want to participate in? Well, that's exactly how I felt at that moment. I was looking at all the shocked people in front of me, wishing I could escape the courtyard. I don't know why, but I suddenly found it more appealing to run away to the Lonely Mountain all by my lonesome self - pun not intended - and yell right at Smaug's fire-spewing reptile face before attempting to resolve this mess I found myself in.

Yes, I suppose I was somewhat of a coward. I had hoped I would have the entire conversation planned out, having thought it all through during the journey here. However, I was just as clueless about what to do as I was when I first started living with Bilbo. Nevertheless, I had to say something, because Glorfindel seemed like he wanted to interrogate me extensively, and I didn't have the nerve to keep him waiting any longer.

"I know I said this would be temporary, but...well. Here I am?" My statement ended up sounding more like a question, and neither Elrond nor Glorfindel appeared reassured by it. Instead, they both seemed even more bewildered by my presence than before. Which. Fair.

I wasn't reassured either. Seriously, Mairon? What the hell was that? I was supposed to be an ancient being with all the wisdom that a Maia like myself should possess, and I should have been throwing around witty words to boot! Surely I could do better than that! Where was the silver tongue that the Maia of Fire was supposed to be renowned for?

Unfortunately, Gandalf didn't appear to be of much help whatsoever at the moment. He had a glazed look in his eyes that would have concerned me if I hadn't noticed the pipe resting between his fingers. Well. I couldn't really blame him for wanting an easy way out of this situation, or rather, wanting to avoid it altogether. However, did he really have to inhale what seemed to be his entire supply of pipeweed in one go? I was almost offended by his desire to instantly nope the hell out of this conversation. In truth, I found myself envious of his ability to do so.

Anyway, there was no use dwelling on Gandalf's evident shock at my appearance. I had a more pressing matter to attend to - explaining myself to the Lord of Rivendell and his captain of the guard, as well as to the dwarves, who still seemed perplexed and didn't appear ready to speak anytime soon.

My gaze shifted between Elrond and Glorfindel, both of them looking at me expectantly, likely waiting for a more substantial explanation than my awkward initial statement. I opened my mouth and then closed it again.

Yeah, nope.

Honestly, I couldn't figure out what to say in front of so many people. The dwarves and elves observing all this needed to leave. So, there was only one thing I could do at the moment.

"I will wait until you are finished," I told Elrond and Glorfindel in Sindarin, and before they could respond or intervene, I swiftly ascended the stairs, passing by the two elven guards who shamelessly gawked at my departure, and made my way to the elegant pavilion where the White Council convened in the movies. It was the perfect location for a private conversation; elevated, distinct from other structures and communal areas, and undeniably impressive.

The architectural style the elves used was absolutely amazing. It would have taken me hours to find this place if it hadn't been for its location, to be honest, but given its elevation within Rivendell's layout, I found it relatively quickly. Also, there were not many elves around, and the few I encountered I was able to avoid.

The pavilion looked just like in the movie. With a circular layout and arches that gracefully curved and met at the zenith, it formed a dome-like structure that remained open to the surrounding landscape. The lighting of this place was fucking spectacular too. Holy shit, now I got why Bilbo wanted to stay here.