Madness Combat Oneshots!! (Requests Open :D)

«Sanford, wake up.»

{Tw/Cw: (referenced) s3lf h@rm, loss of a loved one, (somewhat referenced) psychological abuse, a description of a dream (not really a nightmare but could be seen as one)}

[Angst, Sanmos implied]

Sanford lit a cigarette and took a drag out of it, it's one of the things that reminded Sanford of him.. The "him" was Deimos.. Deimos died a few months ago, Sanford still missed him more than he'd like to admit..

"wow, Ford, i didn't know you smoked" A familiar voice sounded from behind Sanford.

"Well now you know" Sanford took another drag out of the cigarette.

"a lot changed about you since I died, huh"

"That, it has.. I even have a girlfriend now.. she says she hates me, a lot."

"tough life, but you need to remember that there are still people that care about you"

"Hm..." Sanford fell silent for a moment before speaking up again
"Yeah, I'm aware. And I appreciate that you care... You probably don't really know much about my life now, since you haven't met her. Do you perhaps know what Doc has been up to?"

"you know he's working on reviving me, you should move on, Sanford" Deimos(..?) said, his voice had a weird echo to it.

"That's... actually not what I meant, Deimos."

Sanford let out a soft sigh, before taking another drag out of the cigarette.

"What I meant was, do you know what happened to Doc after you died?"

"why would i know, I'm just a creation of your imagination because you can't cope with my death, move on, Sanford"

"..."

Sanford fell silent once more, not expecting that response, and he stayed like that for a few seconds, before sighing again

"Okay Deimos, I know you are just in my head but... there's one thing you gotta know.."

He paused for a moment before saying it.

"I'm trying..."

D̶e̶i̶m̶o̶s̶ spoke up.
"you have a girlfriend now, you can't miss me forever"

"Do you know what Doc did when he found out i got a girlfriend?"

Sanford took a puff as he spoke.

"He was.. very happy for me.. he thought i finally moved on.. Doc thought i'd finally.. stop hurting myself over you.." Sanford looked down at his arm not even turned to face D̷̻̞̙͓̩͇̿e̵̟̞͛̚î̵̧͚̞̘͎̆̋͆̕ͅm̴̧̞̪̫͙̐̎̑̊o̵͍̔̌͆̎͛͝s̷̨̲͎͇̖̘̎͌͜.

"Sanford.. you're aware that I'm not actually Deimos.. right?"

"... Yes, I am."
He paused for a few seconds feeling as if he was about to cry
"I know you aren't really Deimos, and that you're just a figment of my mind. But I'm still going to talk to you as if you were him, because..."
He said before taking another drag out of the cigarette
"..You remind me of him, and because I guess I miss and need him too."

"you don't need me- him, you don't need him, you need to forget and move on already, you're hurting yourself, Ford, you have a girlfriend to care for, you don't need to worry about an old friend"

"... I know I have a girlfriend, I appreciate that her, but..."
He trailed off, then sighed again
"Listen, Deimos, I know you aren't real, and I know that I'm hurting myself by keeping this up, I know that, that's why..."
He fell silent. He wanted to say "That's why I'm trying to move on." But... he couldn't, he felt like he was about to let it all out, barely keeping his tears in.

"but then why can't you move on"

"Because I... just can't, and I don't know what to do about it, I feel like I'm just going insane, I-"
Sanford stopped, he stayed silent, as if fighting something inside. As if he was going to say something else, but stopped and went silent instead.

"..."
D̶e̶i̶m̶o̶s̶ was silently standing behind Sanford before speaking up
"..you loved him didn't you"

"What-?! No, I-"

He would try to deny it, but, as much as he was ashamed of himself for thinking it...
"Maybe, I might've."

"you did, I'm a part of your mind, San. You can't lie to yourself"

"... I know."
Sanford stayed silent, he took another drag out of the cigarette.
"But I... don't want to keep lying to myself, I want this to stop hurting."

"it won't stop until you stop loving him"
D̶e̶i̶m̶o̶s̶ said.

"... You're... you're right, I... I know that you aren't actually Deimos, but... you are exactly like i remember him..."
Sanford trailed off again, not really knowing what else to say.
"..Any clue on how I stop hurting, and stop loving him..?"

D̶e̶i̶m̶o̶s̶ slowly shook his(its) head.
"Sanford.. I am a creation of your subconscious, if you don't know the answer then neither do i."

"You-.... yeah.. good point"
Sanford stayed quiet, letting out a sigh, then, after a few seconds, he spoke up
"... You wanna hear something kinda ironic, Deimos..?"

"..hm?"

"It's... Ironic that, you being a part of my mind, and knowing how I'm feeling, you're being way kinder to me than... anyone else would be.."

"..he cared about you, Ford, he would sacrifice his life for you and he did just that, you remember him like this and your mind made a mental copy of that."

"..Maybe I do, and maybe I don't, but it's... refreshing to have someone actually be kind to me, you know.."

He stopped for a moment, then continued, with a sad tired smile and a sigh
"...Even if you are just in my mind.. I'm happy we can at least talk like we used to.."

"...i'm not Deimos.. You need to wake up, Sanford."

"...wha-...w-what so you mean "wake up"..??"

"...Wake. Up."

"..Wake up from what, Deimos..?!"

"This your subconscious, Sanford and you need to wake up, now."

"I-I don't follow... Wake up from what..?"
Sanford was a bit frightened by the sudden change of tone from D̷̻̞̙͓̩͇̿e̵̟̞͛̚î̵̧͚̞̘͎̆̋͆̕ͅm̴̧̞̪̫͙̐̎̑̊o̵͍̔̌͆̎͛͝s̷̨̲͎͇̖̘̎͌͜, even if he knew he was safe inside his own mind.

"..Wake up from my mind..?"

D̶e̶i̶m̶o̶s̶ sighed softly "..Wake up from this dream, Sanford.. Something important is happening."
Before Sanford could respond, D̶e̶i̶m̶o̶s̶ faded away, and his vision went black.

...

Sanford was woken up by a message from Doc.

The message said nothing more than "Sanford, report to base, Deimos is back."