Lost Between Worlds

Forty-Two

⚠️Mentions self harm & child loss⚠️

BB scoffed as she began to undress, of course he would bring it up. She had a feeling that he resented that part of her, but right now, she didn't care, all she wanted was to feel anything other that the pain he caused her.

Stood in just her underwear, she picked up the bottle of ale, and her knife. She could heal, but she wouldn't go too far, Evie needed her. She drank a mouthful, and her door banged open, her eyes flicking to Peter in the mirror, seeing him irritated.

'Apparently we're going out, so get dressed..'.. He walked over, taking the knife and bottle from her. He put the bottle on her desk, and slipped the blade in his belt.

'They really want to unleash me on people when I'm in this mood?..'... She gestured to herself, as he folded his arms.

'Yep. Steve told Grant he's taking care of Evie, so you can enjoy yourself. I'm sure more was said..'.. He shrugged... 'But I don't care..'

'Who knew Rogers had a pair..'.. BB smirked... 'You're more surly than usual, what did he say to you?..'... She went to the closet, and began to go through her clothes.

'Nothing important..'.. Peter shook his head.

'Bullshit. You know I don't like it when you keep things from me..'.. She looked around the door at him.

Peter sighed, and leaned back against her desk... 'He asked me if I miss 'it'..'.. He saw her frown for a few seconds, and then she grinned at him.

'Hate to admit it, but yeah he's got a point. Single again..'.. She tilted her head at him... 'Do you think they would?..'

Peter chuckled as she disappeared back around the door to finish changing... 'This lot are very different from ours, I don't know. Have you looked to see if anyone else exists here?..'

'Yes..'.. She says, and then comes around the door, making him sigh.

'I know that dress..'.. He looked away from her, shaking his head.

'Yep..'.. She popped the 'p'... 'I haven't had sex since I was back on our world, and I plan on rectifying that tonight..'.. He looked back at her, as she moved to her vanity and sat down, quickly doing her make up and hair.

Peter was curious... 'Do you have any?..'

'We're not getting into that..'.. She sighed... 'I know what you're doing..'.. She turned to face him with a small smile... 'You know me better than anyone else, even more than Grant or Loki ever did..'.. She took a deep breath, as he sat on the end of her bed... 'Its all my fault, everything. I hesitated Peter..'.. She sniffled, her eyes burning with tears that needed to fall... 'I hesitated, and it cost us everything, cost me everything..'

'Charley, I need you to stop blaming yourself. You have never, not once fought hard to protect everyone. You've always been at the forefront, fighting for everything. You didn't cost us nothing. Sometimes bad things happen, and this was a really bad one..'.. He reached out, grabbing the sides of her chair and dragging her closer, so she was still in her seat, between his legs.

'Why are you so set on holding blame? I don't blame you. I love and adore you Charley, you know that. I saw how hard you fought, I saw you lose so much and you kept fighting, not giving up. I didn't see you hesitate, and even if you did, that's not your fault. We were fighting something bigger and stronger than all of us..'.. He pulled her in for a hug, and she started to break.

'I hesitated, because I was pregnant..'.. Her voice was thick with emotions, and he held her tighter. Peter knew without even asking, she didn't have a child here, only Evie... 'I didn't want to lose the baby, but I knew I'd lose more if I didn't fight. When I ended up here, I thought at least I'd still have a part of him, of our family, our world still with me..'.. He felt her fingers dig into him, as a sob wracked through her... 'I was alone, two days later. I lost everything..'

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Bucky looked across to the others, as they stood outside her door, hearing what was said. He caught Steves eye, and he could see the same sadness and pain as he felt.

How could this strong, amazing woman, who literally saved them all, from themselves, each other and the world, still have the strength to keep going? She really had lost everything, and still fought to protect everyone.

She killed those that were evil, and did it with a smile. She basically had the government in a vice grip by their balls, and strong armed the team to work better. Everything that he had ever been through, everything he had endured, was nothing compared to what she had suffered.

He couldn't understand why the fuck Grant was walking away from her. She'd lost so many people she loved, not by choice, but that asshole wanted to up and leave? Not to mention she said she hadn't fucked anyone in the years she had been here, and he believed that with no hesitation. Who in their right mind, would cheat on her?

Her heartbreaking cry was like a knife to the gut. She had been there, comforted him through his nightmares, helped him to get rid of the soldier, free him from his past. When he had woken from the night terrors, realising he had hurt her, she just cracked jokes that he could make it up to her, by testing his new arm out on Nat, she needed that gossip.

'I need the pain. Please Peter, I can't take this, I need the pain..'.. He frowned at her words, and saw Steve shift uncomfortably at the other side of her open door.

'Charley..'.. Peters voice floated out with a sigh.

'Please. You know how..'...

'I'm not the one you need Charley. It would be us using each other, and I love you too much to go there with you again..'.. Buckys eyes widened as he understood what was just said. They had slept together in the past. He knew they were not related at all, but her dad was Tony in her world, and little Parker was Tony's kid in this world. He was the only one on the team to know the truth, but he could still see the shock on Steve and the others faces.

'Then give me my knife, I'll be fine. You know I won't go too far..'.. She sniffled.

Before anything else was said, Bucky felt a shove on his shoulder and Loki had pushed past him, straight into her room, before he had the chance to grab him back.

'Uh, hi? Why do you lo-..'

Silence fell, and then they heard Peter... 'You lot really are nosy..'.. His voice came closer and he stepped out into the hall, noticing the small crowd around the door... 'He took her away, don't know where, don't know why, but she'll be fine. I don't want the questions, I just want a drink..'

Bucky saw Steve fidget and then clear his throat... 'Let's go then..'.. He had taken Hills hand, and led the rest of them down the hall.

'What the actual fuck?..'.. Nat whipsered next to him... 'I don't even know where to start on unravelling this shit..'.. She shook her head, and they followed after the others. Bucky still hadn't said anything, trying hard to understand it all.

He needed to sit and write it all down, create a timeline of it all, but he knew BB was bottling it all up. She needed to talk to someone, or have an outlet that didn't involve her being alone with a sharp object.

😘