outer banks - one shots

regret - rafe

You're currently pouring yourself a new drink when someone bumps into you from the side, causing your cup to tip over and spill it's contents over the counter.

"Can't you watch where you're going?" you curse, turning irritably to the stranger.

"Sorry y/n..." mumbles Elle, a girl from your high school.

Sighing, you grab your cup and pour the golden liquor in again.

Throughout the evening, you haven't been able to fully let loose, as your thoughts constantly haunt you.

Thoughts of him.

You and Rafe recently broke up. Well, you broke up with him.

He cheated on you, and the pain still runs deep. You never thought he would do that, the boy you love and believed loved you too.

You cried for days, searching for the mistake in yourself, but in the end he's just another jerk, who doesn't deserve you.

That's why you accepted an invitation from another guy, being here with him instead of your ex boyfriend. He's genuinely sweet, trying his best to lift your spirits, which somewhat works.

Just as you start to let go and enjoy the evening, the beautiful moment is abruptly ruined again.

You see Rafe entering through the door, scanning the crowd until he notices you, his eyes truly locking onto yours.

You immediately roll your eyes as you see him take a few steps towards you. After everything that went down between the two of you, it was obvious that he was the last person you wanted to talk to right now.

The room around you two gets silent as he tries to find the right words. "hey..y/n."

"Cameron." You call him by his last name, not giving him the satisfaction of letting his name slip from your lips.

"Can we talk?" He approaches some more, slightly grabbing your arm.

"What is there to talk about?" You laugh out sarcasticly, glaring at your ex.

"Please.." he mumbles, his voice so faint that you almost can't hear it.

For a moment, you just stare at him, observing how his ocean-blue eyes look at you with sadness. His hair is slightly tousled, but he still wears the middle part that you like so much.

Is he doing this intentionally?

Of course, your mind screams to push him away and never talk to him again, but your heart still longs for him, even though he's the one who broke it.

"Fine." you give in and follow him to a quieter area of the house.

A few seconds later, you find yourselves on one of the terraces, located at the back of the house, and thus relatively sound-isolated.

"Y/n, I miss you.." Rafe suddenly blurts out, making you squint your eyebrows together.

"That's it? You miss me?" You cross your arms.

Was he being fucking serious?

He approches you again, coming closer than before, "I don't want to loose you..I can't, you mean too much to me."

"Well, you should've thought about that before you decided to fucking cheat on me." You spit back at him, tears forming in your eyes as the memories return.

"I'm so sorry baby, please forgive me." The boy reaches up to wipe your tears away, making you close your eyes.

"Give me one reason I should.." you cross your arms, creating some distance between the two of you.

"Because I love you." He says in a whisper, breaking your vulnerable heart even more. "So you hurt the people you love?"

"I didn't mean to..I was fucking hammered and we had this huge fight before and then I just met this girl and.." he tries to explain, his voice feeling shaky.

"You're disgusting, Rafe." You cry out, tears streaming down your face.

You feel him panicking, lifting his arms to calm you down somehow. "No, please don't say that..it was the biggest mistake of my life. I swear, to never hurt you like that ever again."

A minute of complete silence settles between both of you, only the cool air and the faint voices of the singing party guests can be heard.

Slowly, the boy approaches you, pulling you closer, and you lack the strength to resist, so you let yourself be embraced, resting your head against his chest.

"How can I ever trust you again?" You cry into his chest, your voice muffled by his grey shirt.

Rafe begins to rub your back, trying his best to give you the comfort you need right now. "Please y/n..I'm sorry, I really am. I can't even sleep cause I feel so bad about what happened. You didn't deserve this." His voice is filled with sorrow and regret.

Even though that's exactly what you've been wanting to hear from him all this time, even if he apologizes now, you would have hoped for him to tell you from the start.

That he had the courage to say it to your face back then, so you wouldn't have to hear it from others and confront him about it.

"It was dumb, Rafe.." you mumble.

"I know, it really was." He replies with a soft voice, placing a light peck onto your head.

"I can't be with someone I can't trust..you broke my heart." Tears are forming in your eyes again, the pain still so strong.

The dark blonde boy still holds you close to him, not letting go, "I know I know, but please give me a chance to prove myself..please?" You hear how desperate he sounds, biting down onto your lip.

"You can't always expect to fix everything with a simple 'sorry' Rafe."

"I know." You notice he's not letting you go, his grip is getting tighter instead.

"And I should really get back to the party, I'm with someone right now." You realize, that you've been gone for way too long. Your date must be searching for you.

"Oh.." you feel him loosen his grip around you until you're fully out of his arms.

"Yeah, I should go. We're both not in the best state right now and we shouldn't try and solve this at a stupid party." You explain, not wanting to make any hasty decisions while being under the influence.

"You're right..I-I'll go home then." Rafe replies with his head facing the ground.

Seeing him like that makes your heart physically hurt, Rafe is barley this emotional and you know that he wishes to turn back the time.

Maybe one day the two of you could figure things out, but that wasn't destined for tonight...